Shock Your Potential

Asymmetry & Success - John Vespasian

"Whatever you do, or whatever your talent or profession is, you will do much better if you deploy your assets in the right configuration." John Vespacian
There are many reasons why history matters, and when history is perceived from a biographical point of view, the stories start to be more relatable and the lessons more applicable at an individual level. Our guest today, John Vespacian, approaches history from this very interesting angle and enables people to see historical patterns that enhance their understanding and insights on how to solve the problems they presently face.  
John Vespasian is the author of eleven books about rational living, including "When everything fails, try this" https://amzn.to/3xVdAbM (2009), "Rationality is the way to happiness" https://amzn.to/3spQbOL (2009), "The philosophy of builders" https://amzn.to/3CSBoRq (2010), "The 10 principles of rational living" https://amzn.to/3iOlI9P (2012), "Rational living, rational working" https://amzn.to/3xSJWUS (2013), "Consistency: The key to permanent stress relief" https://amzn.to/3z7TGfr (2014), "On becoming unbreakable" https://amzn.to/3iOKk2i (2015), "Thriving in difficult times" https://amzn.to/3xW55NP (2016), "Sequentiality: The amazing power of finding the right sequence of steps" https://amzn.to/3iSZ1kN (2017), "Undisrupted: How highly-effective people deal with disruptions" https://amzn.to/3k06ldZ (2019), and "Asymmetry: The shortcut to success when success seems impossible" https://amzn.to/3iPwEnM (2020).
Vespasian has lived in Germany, Italy, France, Spain, and The Netherlands. His books combine his passion for history, investing, and personal development, reflecting his philosophy of rational living, productiveness, and respect for the individual. The purpose of Vespacian's work is to draw practical lessons from history and believes that if a person wants to make good decisions, they have to look at the big picture and learn from the wisdom accumulated in centuries of human experience. He argues that knowledge is the only valid response to stress, the only formula that can make a person more effective. His books contain the wisdom he has accumulated in decades of research, and he believes that it is all about learning from other people's successes and mistakes and figuring out how to apply those principles to your own life. In every book, Vespacian goes through biographies and historical events with the goal of extracting from them lessons that people can use right now.
In this episode, our guest will tell us more about his approach to history and how he uses the lessons to educate people on handling present situations. He will also highlight a few of the biographies in his book and the lessons derived from them.
 
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Social media handles
https://sites.google.com/view/assymetry/home  
https://www.facebook.com/john.vespasian
https://twitter.com/JohnVespasian  
http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B00IP34FJQ  
http://johnvespasian.blogspot.com/
https://sites.google.com/view/asymmetry-detailed-info/home
 
What I do is combine my history with personal development. [2:58]
Each of my books contains the essence of short biographies of people from different professions, centuries, and countries. [3:03]
I try to extract the patterns of success and the patterns of failure by analyzing real stories from real people, which I consider to be a very practical approach to history. [3:13]
I look at history as a major teacher of thinking patterns of behavior of human nature where if you don't learn from history, you are likely to repeat the same mistakes that people made centuries ago. [3:40]
Unfortunately, the history we learn at school is usually presented in a very useless way, which makes people very frustrated with it. [3:55]
I am trying to change this pattern in my books by having a perspective of history that is super practical and entertaining because I try to extract from each biography key points that people can use today in their daily lives. [4:07]
My latest book titled asymmetry contains the message that to be successful in life and get something done, it is much easier to do it if you take an asymmetric approach giving the example of Mozart, a very famous musician. [4:46]
A lesson from the book is that whatever you do or whatever your talent or profession is, you will do much better if you deploy your assets in the right configuration. [7:44]
In the book, I analyze in great detail, how Hannibal who was a general, fought against the Roman Empire very successfully for almost 20 years with fewer soldiers in a foreign territory. [7:57]
A very important lesson from history is that you should not get discouraged because you have fewer resources, are less experienced, or have fewer contacts than other people. If you deploy what you have in the right configuration, you can multiply your effectiveness. [9:06]
Another lesson from the book is from using chess players to compare their actual lives with their way of playing chess. [ 9:55]
There is a great component of personal style when you play chess, as it is a game that allows people to deploy their personalities. [10:12]
It is very interesting to see from the great masters how they manage to win when they're playing chess, especially when they had everything against them. [10:22]
In the book Asymmetry, I recount the story of Alekhine, who was a grandmaster or world champion, in the 1920s and 1930s, before the Second World War. [10:34]
The biography is fascinating because one of the things you learn from his personal life and his way of playing is that you will have situations in life where you can't figure out the right strategy because you don't have all the elements or the situation is too complex. Still, you will eventually find an opening and win the battle by taking small initiatives and testing the waters. [10:56]
Commercial Break. [12:54]
It is very important that in life, you get the right perspective, and for most people, this is going to be 85 years to try to see progress in perspective, because otherwise, it's very easy to go crazy, it's very easy to become desperate if you take a very short-term perspective. [14:15]
If you take this perspective, you will see your problems from a different perspective as long as you keep using your time effectively and try to improve the situation little by little; after a few years, you will not even remember. [15:13]
One thing that I am very skeptical about in my books is positive thinking in the way that most people understand it. [16:42]
People don't realize that positive thinking is very dangerous unless coupled with rational and consistent action because it makes people super anxious. [17:18]
It is much better to have a low-key approach to try to come up first with a solid plan and objective you can pursue, and then you will have plenty of time to become enthusiastic. [18:02]
The results of the analysis are that most successful careers are asymmetric. This is very important to understand because when you analyze the lives of successful people in history, you see that many of them became successful after failures. [19:24]
When you look at the biographies in detail, you will see the enormous amount of failure and distress. It is only by doing asymmetric strategies, trying different things, and focusing on what works that people will emerge successful and happy. [21:32]
Another aspect that I often underline in my books is that you have to find sustainable ways to take care of your health before you become sick. [22:29]
I spend a lot of time researching Ancient Medicine, especially herbal medicine and ancient Greek medicine. I have to tell you that the principles of maintaining your health have been known since ancient Greek and haven't changed a lot despite new technology. [23:14]
When you go to Ancient Greece and see that people lived fairly long and were able to stay healthy with very few resources, there are important lessons to draw. [23:39]
One of the good habits I think everybody should acquire because it's very inexpensive and beneficial is to get used to drinking herbal tea such as chamomile, mint, sage. [23:52]
Whatever business you do, wherever your profession or career, you have to find a way by looking at your processes, dedication, and time allocation to develop asymmetric advantages. [25:59]
You have to spend time identifying the steps that add most of the value to what you're doing and try to focus and optimize on those. [26:26]
I have the biography of Velasquez, a very famous artist in the 17th century, and he made a fortune just because he changed his procedure. [27:17]
It would be best to spend some time per month, maybe a couple of hours, trying to read some history or something that you find interesting to gain some perspective. [30:25]
It is a very good investment which will make you much more logical in your thinking and much more relaxed because you will get the perspective of the centuries [30:58]
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Loyalty Vs. Royalty - Rick Messing

"Loyalty is at the bottom of human relationships, and the way to become the most effective human being is to become purely loyal to everybody." Richard Messing
When addressing chronic problems, organizations often struggle to acknowledge the complex human component. Most often, you will find that organizations solve these problems by understanding and learning the language and logic required to address the human condition. This is according to our guest today, Richard Messing, who believes that it all starts by getting the organization's belief system right.
People are seeking greater meaning, freedom, and growth in their personal and professional lives. Because the source of freedom, meaning, and growth is poorly understood, they are often difficult to achieve and maintain. For this reason, in 2004, Richard Messing embarked on a research project culminating in The Ethic of Human Repair, the intellectual property that documents the underlying principles and methods that describe, explain, and solve chronic personal or organizational problems where human freedom, meaning, and growth pertain.
Richard is a published writer, invited conference speaker, and thought leader on the human condition in general and free will in particular. In 2019, Richard formed Kotel Group LLC, an ethics-based business consulting firm, to rehabilitate and transform chronically underperforming for-profit or non-profit organizations that resist conventional management interventions and methodologies. In 2020, Richard established the ethics-based Kotel Business Community and believes it is impossible to master this essential and ethical business concept without the key insight that the human condition is fundamentally paradoxical.
In today's episode, our guest will talk more about the human condition and its importance in solving organizational problems. He will also give insights into loyalty and why he considers it the fundamental basis for meaningful and successful human relationships.
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Social media
 https://www.linkedin.com/in/richardmessing/  
https://www.facebook.com/Kotel-Group-LLC-114607453623705/
 
I became fascinated with the idea that problems become chronic because it meant that people had tried many different things, even the most conventional methods, but they can't seem to crack the problem. [ 3:25]
I wanted to find out what causes a human problem to become chronic. [3:49]
Sixteen years ago, I just started my research project, and what I do is coming to help the client when they have unsuccessfully tried to solve their problems with their people. [4:14]
I teach my clients something about the human condition that they don't understand, which is that the human condition is paradoxical, and when you learn this, you learn a language and logic that you can use to analyze your chronic problems, then start to resolve. [4:46]
A false belief is when you believe something is true when it's actually false and when this happens, the information you're believing is true now lives inside your nervous system as true. [6:12]
Our nervous system uses our belief system to generate our perceptions, which determines our behavior. [6:37]
I teach my clients that they have a false belief about their own business and how to manage people and that's why they're having this chronic problem. [7:26]
I then teach them how false beliefs work and why they create chronic problems, and after that, we can then start analyzing their false beliefs and correct them. [7:45]
When a client of mine is so certain about why they have their problem, I challenge them that if they were right, they would be able to solve the problem. [8:48]]
I teach people and show them that you can have a perfectly sensible, common sense explanation for something completely false. [9:06]
I am not afraid to challenge my clients right from the beginning, and I believe that they wouldn't be hiring me if they knew what they were doing. [10:28]
People will either open up and be willing to be coached, or I can't help them. [11:01]
A coach can't be afraid to confront and challenge their client, and if there's an ounce of fear in the coach, he's not going to be an effective coach. [11:32]
Commercial break. [13:30]
I did a little research and discovered that loyalty and royalty are the same words, except for the first letter. [15:01]
Loyalty is at the bottom of human relationships, and the way to become the most effective human being is to become purely loyal to everybody. [18:29]
The definition of loyalty is to put the commitments of others first and not for your gain, and this is the ethic of service. [18:50]
When you do that, you show up as their asset, which creates value, much more value than it costs to maintain. [19:44]
You may have a business contract with them which is a trade and has nothing to do with loyalty, and therefore that's not what counts. [20:15]
What counts is your loyalty and whether or not you will do whatever you can to help them fulfill their commitments. [20:37]
When they perceive you that way, you become their asset, and they will want to keep you around, and your kingdom will grow. [20:47]
The secret to becoming a fully loyal human being is paradoxical, where you need to ask yourself whether you are a selfless or selfish person. [21:10]
Most people are both, and it is human nature to be both selfless and selfish. 21:23]
The master, who is the trusted adviser, knows when that little voice in his head says to him, "What am I getting out of this?" That's the voice that's going to cause you to become loyal. [21:30]
You can't become loyal in order to gain personally because that is being selfish. [21:48]
A master understands the paradoxical nature of the human division, so you have to watch out for that and ask what kind of human being you want to be. [22:45]
My suggestion is to commit and declare to yourself that you will be 100% loyal to everybody, which after thinking through, I realized that there is no downside to that. [23:05]
In the olden days, people would shake hands, which would create a bond of trust, but today, lawyers have to have the contracts and write up the contracts. [24:26]
You can't write a contract about loyalty or put it in the book. It has to be created, and you have to interact with your employees and your clients, and prospective clients as a loyal person. [24:55]
If you do it to create demand, now you're selfish and it is called mixed motivations, which is why people don't trust other people. [25:40]
We are talking about the nature of the human condition, and loyalty is human, and if you become that kind of a human being, it will communicate, and people will get it. [28:19]
Once you have achieved and have all of your personal needs met, spend the rest of your life figuring out how to serve other people. [29:51]
Let your life be about serving others, and your kingdom will grow, and you will be taken care of guaranteed. [30:15]
…..….……………........…
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Today‘s Choices Are Tomorrow‘s Outcomes - John Davis

"Life is about motion, and so you have to keep moving forward and trying something new." John Davis
Our perception plays a crucial role in how we recover from life-altering events. Being able to focus on the moment can allow us to transcend these experiences and challenges and come out better than we were. Our guest today, John Davis, is a living example of what positive focus and remaining present in the moment can do to turn misfortunes into opportunities to achieve greatness.
At 22 years old, John Davis' spine broke in half, dashing his dreams of being a Stuntman, Fight Director, and Martial Artist. Doctors told him he might never walk again, and if he did he could never have a physical career. Using what he now calls the "Five F Formula," John Overcame the limiting beliefs of others and brought himself back. He went on to perform over four thousand live comedy sword fighting stunt shows worldwide, including performing more than one hundred shows on the most remote bases in both Iraq and Afghanistan on six USO tours.
He is now an internationally known Speaker, Comedian, Fight Director, and Action Hero. As an international entertainer, John has traveled extensively throughout the world speaking to audiences of all ages and backgrounds in 30 countries and over four thousand live performances. John encourages his audiences to set and reach their highest potentials and awaken their inner action heroes!
In today's episode, John will talk about his life journey and the events that led him to who he is today. He will also give insights on how to be positive in life and kick out fear by implementing what he refers to as the five Fs.
 
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Social Media
https://www.corporateactionhero.com/   
https://www.facebook.com/CorporateActionHero/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/corporateactionhero/  
http://www.twitter.com@jdactionhero/  
https://www.youtube.com/c/JohnDavisActionHero
 
Back when I was a kid, I wanted to be a swashbuckler, and I was fortunate I had 1000s of acres of woods behind my house, which I knew every square inch of it. [3:10]
I ended up getting drugged to a Renaissance Festival and started working on a Renaissance Festival in Maryland. [3:33]
I met two of the top fighters in the country who gave me a great gift: a series of positive reinforcement that I had never gotten from my alcoholic and abusive father. [3:38]
I ended up having these two gentlemen, who were just incredible men, also say to me that they thought I had talent as an actor and a combatant, and they ended up giving me all their training for free. [3:50]
I was feeling really good about myself and was going for my black belt, and at that point, I was strong. I was buff, and I was feeling like a rock-hard, masculine guy. [4:03]
A buddy of mine asked me to go over to his house and help unload his van, and I agreed. [4:23]
He had a van filled with 80-pound boxes of clay. I picked up the very first box, and as I turned to set it outside of the van, my spine broke in half due to the twisting action. [4:34]
At the hospital, the doctor said that I had a condition called spina bifida and would probably never walk again. Even if I did, I definitely would never have a physical career and needed to change my [4:51]
I was lying in that bed in the hospital, and a friend of mine came in, and he brought me a book to read, written by Bruce Lee, the greatest martial artist that ever lived. [5:22]
When Bruce wrote that book, as I came to find out, he was in traction in the hospital and had just been told he'd never do martial arts again. [5:46]
I started reading that book, and it was about his philosophy on martial arts, not about a technique where I found a couple of things that I latched on to quickly. [6:06]
One of them was staying in my present moment, and the other was mental flexibility. Whenever adversity comes up, by staying very flexible in those moments, you can achieve anything. [6:15]
Because I had to stay very present, I could not invest in the future that the doctors were giving me; I couldn't take their beliefs but my own belief. [6:25]
I started flexing the muscles of my upper neck and slowly over the course of a month, flexed all the muscles down my back until I got to my injury. [6:42]
I started flexing my hips, which was below the injury, and the doctors were blown away since within a month, I was moving the hips that they thought we never move again. [6:51]
A couple of weeks later, I was able to sit up, walk down the hallway, and go to the bathroom on my own, and then at a year, I was back to what I would say was normal physicality. [6:59]
I did not take the doctor's belief and did what I had to do, and after a year and six months, I was back to my full physical self. [7:33]
I'm fortunate because I was raised as a young Catholic boy, and when I turned 18, my mother told me that spirituality is a personal journey and that I needed to find my [8:37]
I traveled all over India and all through the Middle East, and studied every form of spirituality I could find, and I found the universal truth in all of it. [8:50]
When I look back at what I did to get out of that bed right now, I come back to a couple of things. [9:00]
Buddha says, 'what you think, you become, you create your world,' Gandhi says, 'You must be the change you want to see in your world,' the Bible says, 'as a man thinketh so is he,' and Jesus said 'whatever you ask in God's name will be granted.' [9:04]
Moses said God's name is 'I Am', and I am is your present moment, not your 'I will be' or 'I was' and so you have to sit and get into that present moment and realize that you are the creator of that experience. [9:17]
All this manifested in the rest of my life, where I became a professional stunt man and did everything I have ever wanted to do. [9:47]
What I do now is I go into corporations, and I awaken the interaction heroes in their teams and get them moving. [10:12]
When I was doing my comedy show, I found I was enjoying the time off the stage more than I was on the stage because I was sitting in the audience talking to people awakening their interaction heroes and getting them over their adversity. [10:20]
I go as a corporate action hero, and I bring something so unique, which are whips and dump trucks and comedy, into a program. [10:45]
The final thing I do in my main keynote speech is I pick the timidest person I can find in my audience, I bring them to the stage, and in under five minutes, that person learns to crack a whip and hit targets out of my hand. [10:56]
When you look at your life, you only have one moment that you can do thought, word, and deed, and all your past is memories of present moments, and so many people sit at this moment, and they live in the victim mode those past moments. [12:04]
The problem with negative people is they live in victim mode and are focused on victim mode, and therefore their subconscious mind shows them victim mode, which puts them in this never-ending treadmill of negativity. [13:04]
The only way to break that cycle is to take your present moment and start stacking positive, successful present moments. [13:15]
Going into a new school year, students and teachers are looking at this year coming up, and they think it is daunting, but the successful outcome of this year isn't going to appear magically in your present moment. [13:26]
Your key is to stay here in this moment and make it as positive and successful as possible, and that outcome will come and surround your present moment experience. [13:47]
I was the overweight, introverted kid who was bullied through entire schools at that time, and so when I look at the kids going back to school right now, I feel for the ones who feel marginalized. [14:33]
Life is about motion, and so you have to keep moving forward and trying something new. [15:30]
Commercial break. [15:50]
I have a hard time with negativity because I'm such a positive person, and I've walked in my life with a smile on my face, which is fascinating by life. [17:01]
The number one thing that stops everybody from achieving their goals is how you manage fear. [18:33]
One of the quickest and easiest ways to get out of your way is to realize a couple of things. [18:48]
When you break down fear scientifically, it is an emotional reaction to some future event that may or may not happen. You focus on a negative outcome because you wouldn't be afraid if you were focused on a positive outcome. [19:20]
When people feel like they're in fear and feel like they can't breathe, it is a mental state but not a real state, and once you believe you are in something, you can not control it. [21:36]
When you take the second to exhale and label it, it becomes an external thing and now you can do whatever you want with it, which is important. [21:48]
Apart from releasing fear, you have to focus, and then you have to work on your belief, faith, and [21:58]
Sometimes faith is only developed by results over time where you start stacking present moment successes, and your faith build [22:16]
The last one is flexibility, where when something comes up that seems contrary to what you're trying to achieve, you have to stay flexible on those moments. [22:33]
When I look at this from the perspective of the conscious and subconscious mind, If I'm focused on a goal, and my subconscious mind shows me something that seems like it's going to stop me from getting to my goal, I have to keep my mind in play stay focused on the goal so that my subconscious mind shows this to me. I have to clear any obstacle out of the way. [22:48]
If you're focused positively, you can achieve anything you want in your life, so you have to fearlessly focus with faith and follow through with flexibility. [23:12]
Today's choices are tomorrow's outcomes, so take today and make it positive and successful and make good choices. [25:06]
When one of the moments doesn't go well, don't beat yourself up because beating yourself up is just wasting the next moment. [25:15]
…………………………………………………
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Courageous Dialogues - Charmaine Hammond

"We have to make sure that people understand how to collaborate effectively and have the tools and resources to do it." Charmaine Hammond
In order to enable the achievement of mutually agreed goals, people have to foster interactions that promote collegiality, trust and respect. This is especially crucial in the workplace where cooperation between colleagues is required to perform the shared responsibilities effectively. Our guest today, Charmaine Hammond has worked in environments characterized by conflicts and says that collaboration is key in ensuring conducive work environments.
Charmaine Hammond, CSP (Certified Speaking Professional) is a highly sought-after business keynote and workshop speaker, entrepreneur, author and educator who teaches and advocates the importance of developing trust, healthy relationships and collaboration in the workplace. She has helped clients in many industries build resilient and engaged workplaces, develop high trust/high accountability relationships, and solve workplace issues and conflict that gets in the way of success and profitability. She is respected as a "no fluff" and "rich content" speaker who delivers tangible tools to step into action immediately. Delivering her programs in person and virtually (she is a Certified Virtual Presenter through eSpeakers), she brings results and facilitates change.
Charmaine is a former Correctional Officer (yup! She worked in jails) and Corporate Dispute Resolution Expert and now travels the world teaching the principles of collaboration, communication/conflict resolution and resilience. She also has an extensive background facilitating processes to help collaborations and workplace/team relationships when they go sideways. As a former mediator, she has helped facilitate some of the most complex collaborations and partnership arrangements. She has also been called to several communities that have experienced disasters to help rebuild resilience and recovery processes.
Charmaine has a Master's Degree in Conflict Management & Analysis, is a bestselling author (of 5 books & featured in 6 others), and CSP™ Certified Speaking Professional. She has also been featured in renowned publications such as Inc., Occupational Health & Safety Magazine, and many others and appeared as a guest on numerous TV and Radio Programs. She is Executive Producer of an animated film, Back Home Again, which will be released in fall 2021, features an all-star voice cast of many widely known celebrities. This movie (and movement) was designed to be a conversation starter about mental health and community.
In today's episode, Charmaine will talk about her experiences dealing with conflict resolution at different organizational levels and contexts. She will also provide insights on the importance of fostering collaboration in team settings.
Listen in!
Social Media:
https://www.facebook.com/CharmaineHammondSpeaker/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/charmainehammond
https://twitter.com/hammondgroupbiz  
https://www.instagram.com/charmaine_hammond
After I left the jail system, I went back to school and became a mediator, and I was mediating conflicts in family, community and workplaces. [3:00]
I fell in love with working for non-profit organizations, and then I ventured into working in mental health, where I worked in various capacities. [3:21]
At one point, I even volunteered with my dog, a therapy dog, and we volunteered in a psychiatric hospital, and it was so powerful. [3:31]
And all of these experiences led to what I do now, which is speaking, training and facilitating teams, groups, project committees, on how to collaborate better, work better together, remain resilient in changing times, and also how to resolve those tough issues that get in the way of success, conflict being one of them. [3:42]
I get to work in these workplace environments and on projects where I get to tie in all of my skill sets and all of the things that, I believe, helped me shock other people's potential. [4:04]
We also work with entrepreneurs, non-profits, and service clubs, to help them raise their dreams and fund their projects through collaboration. [4:22]
One of the challenges that I had when I was preparing to leave the correctional system role as a correctional officer and move into a different career was that many of the ways we handled conflict don't work in other situations. [5:58]
I went back to school and learned communication and conflict resolution. A lot of the training we had in corrections was related to crisis, not necessarily the negotiation part of working through a tough issue. [6:25]
It taught me a lot about humility, being humble, the importance of respect, and how it can change everything when you show up at a tough time in someone's life. [6:43]
All of these softer lessons led me to fall in love with a structured process to resolve conflict, which is why I went back to school to become a mediator. [6:54]
My biggest learning was the power of listening to what is and is not being said. [7:14]
So, when you hear people in conflict talking about what matters to them, what's driving their position, what their underlying interests are, the ability to resolve the issue is so much easier because you're getting to the core of what matters. [7:21]
I realized that prior to that, I was always dealing with things on such a basic surface level, and you have to go deeper in conflict, and that is one of the reasons it is uncomfortable for both of us. [7:35]
We need to look at resilience building, conflict resolution, communication and stress management, not as soft skills training but as essential skills. It is a softer approach to dealing with human issues, but they are essential skills. [9:25]
Commercial Break. [10:43]
These courageous dialogues don't happen because people don't know how to get the conversation going, so what happens is, it's avoided. [12:11]
One of the things that I've learned is that as humans, we're typically pretty forgiving, where if you are providing feedback to someone and it doesn't land right, that is an opportunity to say I'm sorry and clarify your intentions. [12:35]
I have learned that whatever these conversations are that require us to be courageous, it sets the stage for a much better conversation. [13:45]
I feel like now more than ever, collaboration in the workplace is essential to help teams shock their potential. [16:19]
Not everybody is naturally a collaborator. Many of us prefer to work independently or in a pair instead of a group. [16:57]
In high performing teams, the ingredients that exist is a willingness to fix things in the moment but a willingness to disagree and realize that their perception is not the perception but simply a perception. [17:10]
It is an opportunity actually to revisit communication and help people work better together and an opportunity to revisit trust. [17:49]
We have to make sure that people understand how to collaborate effectively and have the tools and resources to do it. [18:03]
Remember that proving somebody wrong doesn't make you right. Instead of trying to prove someone wrong, so you can be right, use that energy to bridge understanding and collaboration. [23:33]
…..….…………….....…
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Transformation on the Other Side of Pain - Dr. Fleet Muall

"The thing that's so radical about radical responsibility is that it's the idea of embracing every circumstance we face in life." Dr Fleet Muall
The worst turn of events can turn out to be the best thing to happen, which turns someone's life around to be more useful and meaningful. This is true for our guest today, Dr Fleet Muall, who was able to turn his bad luck of being imprisoned into a journey of growth and transformation. Dr. Fleet attributes this to taking ownership of his actions and working towards being and doing better.
Dr. Fleet Maull, PhD and author, is a renowned growth mindset teacher who delivers his training programs and seminars worldwide, both in-person and online, through Heart Mind Institute. He is a meditation teacher, executive coach, seminar leader and social entrepreneur who works at the intersection of personal and social transformation. Fleet founded the Prison Mindfulness Institute and National Prison Hospice Association, catalyzing two national movements while serving a 14-year mandatory-minimum federal drug sentence, 1985 to 1999.
Dr Maull developed the Radical Responsibility empowerment model that embraces 100 percent ownership for every circumstance we face, free of blaming oneself or others. Fleet is a Roshi (Zen master) in the international Zen Peacemaker Order and Acharya (senior Dharma teacher) in the global Shambhala meditation community. He is the author of Radical Responsibility: How to Move Beyond Blame, Fearlessly Live our Higher Purpose and Become an Unstoppable Force for Good in the World https://amzn.to/3sm7m3M.
In today's episode, Dr Fleet will discuss the eventful journey that led him to become one of the most renowned teacher and coach. He will also provide insights on practicing mindfulness and why it is important, especially in the current world.
Listen in!
Social media handles:
https://www.radicalresponsibilitybook.com/   
https://www.fleetmaull.com/ 
 https://www.heartmindinstitute.co/  
https://www.heartmindinstitute.co/nsm-foundation/  
https://www.bestyear.life/  
https://www.prisonmindfulness.org/  
https://www.mindfulpublicsafety.org/  
https://www.engagedmindfulness.org/  
https://www.npha.org/  
https://www.linkedin.com/in/fleetmaull/  
https://www.facebook.com/fleetmaull/  
https://Twitter.com/FleetMaull/  
I spent 14 years in a maximum security, federal prison on drug charges from 1985 to 1999 and not something I'm proud of at all, especially the activities that got me there. [3:04]
But I do feel really good about what I did with my time. While I was there, I was fortunate that I had a lot of skills and training and education before I went to prison, which kind of begs the question of why I ended up there. [3:16]
I earned my way into that federal prison time, but when I got there, it was a huge wake-up call, especially because my son was nine years old at the time, and I realized he was not going to grow up without a dad. [3:45]
When I went in, I had a master's degree and a very intense clinical trade three-year clinical training program, and I had been trained as a meditation teacher and a Buddhist teacher for ten years. [4:52]
I had a strong background, and I was devastated over what I had done to myself and my family, especially my son. [5:06]
I've lived this very disciplined life of a prison monk, getting up at four or five in the morning and practicing intensively. [5:33]
When I arrived there, I realized that it was an incredibly negative environment and that everyone had their own victim story of one kind or another. [6:24]
Naturally trying to survive, you tend to armor up with your own story and anger and bitterness. Unfortunately, that prevents us from accessing genuine regret and remorse for any harm we've created, which fuels the journey of transformation. [6:57]
It was really clear to me that I didn't want to end up coming out of prison broken, angry and bitter, and I didn't want to live that way when I was in there. [7:11]
I realized that the only way through and out for me was to embrace 200% responsibility for having got myself in there, what I was going to do with my time there, and what I would be able to create for myself if I was ever able to get beyond the prison journey. [7:22]
I stepped out of prison and into a career as a management consultant and executive coach, leading turnarounds and transformative change processes in business. [8:32]
My time in prison trained me how to work with people and how to be skillful under the most challenging situation. [10:45]
There is a term called a pain paradox in psychology, where our natural instinct is to withdraw from pain. [11:15]
But we all know through many disciplines, historically, across cultures into modern psychology, and everything that transformations on the other side of pain and that all the joy and transformation and possibilities on life are on the other side of it. [11:27]
The thing that's so radical about radical responsibility is that it's the idea of embracing every circumstance we face in life. [12:00]
We look at that not to blame ourselves at all, but simply for learning because once I see how it works and how I got from point A to B to C, I can make different choices in the future and get different results. [12:35]
But then there are also situations and circumstances that we may feel we had nothing to do with, and everyone would agree it just fell out of the sky and landed on our heads, and those things may be incredibly unjust. [12:45]
For ourselves, at some point, we question whether we are going to let it take us down, but here it is, and so I have to find some creative way to respond to it, transform it and move forward in my life. [13:02]
Most of us associate things like responsibility and accountability with blame; we've all been enculturated into this culture of shame and blame. [14:06]
It is simply about focusing my energy to do the most good, embracing my capacity for a creative response to life, and doing the best I can with that. [15:03]
While I was in prison, I just focused on my practice and modelled it in terms of who I was, and people became attracted to it. [15:55]
At some point early on, I also started corresponding with other prisoners. I realized it was a much bigger thing that I could do, so I started the prison Dharma network, primarily known as the prison mindful Institute. [16:12]
We have a program called the path of Freedom, a mindfulness-based emotional intelligence training program for prisoners in 21 states in seven countries. [16:37]
We have got involved in the whole criminal justice and public safety system that all grew out of being in a prison cell and saying, "What can I do to transform myself and to bring value to the world?" [17:18]
I also have my whole for-profit business, where I am putting out summits and offering lots of online courses and online challenges that are basically in the realm of integration of mindset and so forth. [17:39]
Growing up, nobody taught us anything about how to navigate the most complex system in the known universe: the human brain and nervous system. We didn't get much training on how to communicate with others. [18:42]
My mindfulness and emotional intelligence training, all these things, are just kind of the basic toolkit for life. [18:55]
Commercial break. [19:09]
We have something called the autonomic nervous system that operates almost the whole of the human body, the human brain and the nervous system, and it has two branches. [21:01]
The sympathetic branch upregulates and is about alertness, distress, and fighter flight, and the parasympathetic branch downregulates and is about relaxation, rest and recovery. [21:13]
The problem is in the modern life, most of us have way too much sympathetic activation, and that's called stress. [21:36]
Over time, that's the source of all the chronic stress-related illnesses, which diminishes the quality of life altogether. [22:06]
A simple skill that you can learn is called strong breathing because our autonomic nervous system are connected with the breath. [22:21]
When we breathe in, there's a slight sympathetic activation when we breathe out slight parasympathetic activation. [22:34]
Straw breathing can be a lifesaver, and it is so simple anyone can learn it. You breathe into the nose with your mouth close, and then you breathe out through pursed lips. [23:06]
One more thing that people can easily add to is 478 breathing, where you breathe in that fourth count, hold for seven counts, and then breathe out for the eighth count. [26:03]
This idea of radical responsibility is not new, it has been around for a long time. [30:27]
Marcus Aurelius said that most people feel their circumstances determine their destiny, but our response to those circumstances determines our destiny and even being able to respond to circumstances rather than being in just our condition reactivity. [30:32]
Most of us walk around thinking we're autonomous, but we're highly mechanical, and so we need to embrace some practices to become more wakeful and more present. [31:04]
Learning something like mindfulness and then embracing this idea of living our lives more in the driver's seat of our own life will transform any circumstance. [31:30]
Regardless of the situation, looking for what I can do put you right back in the mind of solution-based thinking, and there is always a million different things we could do. [31:40]
…..….…………......……
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Successful & Satisfied - Terry McDougall

“When we are outsourcing or asking somebody else to tell us what success looks like, we lose connection with who we are inside.” Terry McDougall
As often witnessed, success requires substantial sacrifice on many fronts. Considering the time and effort spent in order to be a high achiever, success can easily be a place of misery and frustration for many professionals. That is why our guest today, Terry McDougall insists that professionals define success according to their terms. According to Terry, doing this will enable high-achieving professionals to enjoy a balanced life that is happy and fulfilling.
Terry Boyle McDougall is an Executive & Career Coach and CEO of Terry B. McDougall Coaching. She helps high-achieving professionals remove obstacles that keep them stuck so they can enjoy more success and satisfaction in their lives and careers. Before becoming a coach, Terry was a long-time corporate marketing executive where she led teams, developed strategies, and advised senior leaders to drive business results. She is the author of Winning the Game of Work: Career Happiness and Success on Your Own Terms https://amzn.to/2XnMgq7. She is also the host of the Marketing Mambo podcast.
In today’s episode, our guest will tell us more about how to be in balance by being successful while at the same time enjoying fulfillment and happiness. She will also talk about the importance of being aware of what we want and defining what our success looks like.
Listen in!
Links:
Website: https://www.terrybmcdougall.com 
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/terrybmcdougall 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/terrybmcdougall 
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/i_am_coach_terry 
Book: https://www.tinyurl.com/gameofworkbook 
Podcast: https://www.marketingmambo.net
I work with people that I call high achievers who are successful but not satisfied. [3:00]
Very often people get into the trappings of success and pay a very high price for that in terms of stress, anxiety, burnout, health, and relationship problems. [3:18]
I truly believe that we can get things in balance, we can kind of get into a flow where not only can we be successful, but we can be happy as well. [3:36]
I help people to shift the mindset to, first of all, believe that's possible, and also to start to learn skills, so that they can have more impact without working as hard. [3:47]
Many of the issues that people have at work are as a result of what we learn at school such as delayed gratification, looking for validation in other people, and learning to ask the question. [4:48]
When we are outsourcing or asking somebody else to tell us what success looks like, we lose connection with who we are inside. [5:12]
Because I work with people that are already successful, I try to help them start to shift, where they look for validation away from the external and reconnect with their inner wisdom and their desires. [5:31]
I believe that we can show up authentically and be who we are, use the strengths and the gifts that come to us naturally, and still be successful and way happier than we would if we were trying to step into someone else's definition of success. [5:50]
I am seeing some leaders that recognize that they're going to have to do things differently in the workplace. [7:55]
Leaders need to be able to tap fully into the talents and abilities of their staff and the hybrid work environment that many companies are going into may present a challenge. [9:00]
I had a job where I worked for a foreign company and I was the only out-of-country leader that was on the senior team. [10:49]
So often it was me on the zoom call or the conference call, and there was so much that was lost in the context. [11:00]
It was really up to me to sort of bridge that gap and I think that there was a lack of awareness on the part of many of the people in the meetings and the leadership to realize what my experience was like, and it was frustrating. [11:12]
I think that there is sort of unintended consequences with education because it trains us to think in a certain way and it trains us to look to the head of the classroom for our signals. [13:09]
We are the final arbiters of what's right for us and I believe that each of us is here on earth for a reason. [14:04]
One thing that can cause us to behave in ways that aren't aligned with who we are authentically is fear of rejection, fear of criticism, fear of judgment. [14:31]
I have just come to the conclusion that nobody has a right to judge us because they have no idea why we're here. [14:44]
One of the things that I see as a coach is that when you're working with these high achieving people, they're able to do a lot of things but it doesn't mean that everything that they're able to do is something that they like to do. [15:05]
It is natural for friends and family sometimes to have that concern because they are looking at the lowest common denominator. [18:09]
Commercial break. [19:30]
What I want to teach people is how to start reestablishing that thread with their inner wisdom and their true desires. [20:52]
When people come and they're in pain, a lot of times, I'll ask them what it is that they want, and they will either say that they don't know or they will say they know exactly what they want and reasons why it can't happen. [21:05]
My advice to everyone is to separate these two things. [21:36]
When people say they don't know what they want, they do know what they want but they've got a very good internal defense mechanism to keep them from being disappointed if they admit the thing they want. [21:45]
It is okay to say it out loud and then separately figure out some of the things that you could do to make that happen. [22:00]
The reason why I think a lot of times people don't admit to what they want or immediately kind of smother it with all the reasons why they can't have it is because they don't want to be disappointed. [22:25]
Once you start imagining one or two steps you could take in the direction of that dream, that you learn more and start to see more opportunities and you start heading in a direction that is authentic and that is where you find happiness. [22:49]
The world is a miraculous place and we are connected energetically with everything around us and I have seen some truly miraculous things happen. [24:10]
You just have to be out there and be open to starting to see how you could do something different, and how the thing that you want to do is possible and you could be one degree away from the person that's going to give you exactly what you want. [25:30]
There are opportunities where you can talk to somebody at the right time, and find that you might be somebody that they would design a job around. [27:30]
About how people can approach others when they're networking, I always say that you don't need to even know what you want because it is very common for us to not know what we don't know. [27:57]
If there are people doing something that is what you'd like to do, reach out to them and get an introduction to them. [28:18]
The other thing that I say especially when people are not sure of what they want is paying attention to when you feel jealous because that is your inner self saying what it wants. [28:48]
Each person out there, all we deserve to be happy and so get tuned in with what would make you happy. Start taking some baby steps in that direction because you deserve it. [31:34]
…..….………………
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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One Sentence = Crystal Clear Message - Anthony Hayes

“Crisis and bumps in the road or mistakes are an opportunity to discuss and communicate your values and talk about who you are.” Anthony Hayes
Every business is likely to encounter sudden and challenging crises at some point which if not well addressed, can be potentially damaging to reputation. To manage such events effectively, it is important to plan by addressing the existing communication framework. This is according to our guest today Anthony Hayes, who believes that in every crisis lies numerous opportunities for businesses.  
Anthony Hayes is the founder of THI and has spent more than 18 years in communications, crisis and issue management, and political and legislative campaigns. A seasoned C-level advisor, Anthony has cultivated an energetic, fast-growing company now trusted to execute strategy for prominent clients around the globe. He has served leaders at the highest levels including presidential candidates, members of the U.S. Cabinet, governors and other elected officials, C-Suite executives, law enforcement officials, and high-ranking health and legal professionals.
Anthony’s firm has advised clients involved in complex legal matters and managed high-stakes media relations during crises such as Bridgegate, airport security breaches, and natural disasters including Superstorm Sandy and hurricane relief efforts in the U.S. Virgin Islands. At THI, Anthony and his team help leaders and organizations deliver major initiatives, break through the noisy media landscape, and navigate the world of politics and government all the while excelling despite the high pressure, politically sensitive, and confidential issues and at the same time demonstrating the utmost level of discretion and judgment.
In today’s episode, our guest will talk about how communicators can manage crises effectively. He will further share tips on how to be a better communicator.
Listen in!
Social media handles
 https://twitter.com/HayesInitiative
 https://www.facebook.com/HayesInitiative/
 https://www.instagram.com/hayesinitiative/
 https://www.linkedin.com/in/anthonyjhayesnyc/
 https://hayesinitiative.com/
 https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTf78eJzTXSx9oFv2kjFpyA/featured
 
I've been in the communication space for over 18 years. [2:49]
My business started in November 2016 after having a phone call with someone who said that they needed someone to run a nationwide bus tour around not repealing the Affordable Care Act where I asked them to hire our company. [3:25]
Our clients are always trying to connect with different audiences, whether they are in a crisis that we're trying to help them clean up, or they're launching a new initiative, or they just want to remain connected and at Hayes Initiative we help them to the point. [3:59]
I'm stunned at how many people when challenged a bit on what they're trying to say realize they don't know what they're trying to say. [4:22]
People assume that their audiences have unlimited time to talk to them and listen but they do not. [4:45]
So you have to acknowledge that you have very little time to capture someone's attention and so that's why we focus on helping people get to the point. [5:06]
I have been very fortunate that I've worked with many people and through all of these different experiences I have seen when people aren't calm and how that does not help the situation. [8:10]
I learned very early to not be too surprised by the ever-shifting landscape of media and certainly politics. [8:58]
The best thing that you can do in a crisis is to take a breath and avoid going out there and cause more mayhem by responding without all details at hand and there are lots of ways to do that. [9:09]
It is a very challenging environment, especially when you have some of the major national and global outlets sort of breathing down your neck. [10:10]
We have all experienced in the last twelve months a global pandemic that played out on the backdrop of a national presidential election and everyone was figuring out how to communicate. [11:15]
There is logic to sometimes pausing on your response because sometimes reporters and their headlines are just looking to bait you. [12:45]
Leaders like to lead and speak with confidence however the problem is no one had any experience in COVID. [13:14]
The situation thus forced leaders to step in regardless of what they do in business to not have things feel divisive. [13:28]
When you're trying to sort of move something forward that is a new initiative and is positive, you want to connect and get to the point of how it impacts the people. [17:08]
The most succinct thing that I've ever heard in my life was when Steve Jobs released the iPod at a time when none of us had heard of an iPod. [18:08]
When you have a positive message you have to lead with what you're solving. [18:28]
Commercial break. [18:52]
One of the things I've learned more than anything is that everyone wants to communicate well but no one wants to put in the work to figure out what they are trying to say. [20:23]
The biggest actionable steps that I share every day to help people get to the point, is to prepare the messages they are trying to get out. [20:43]
One of the things that you can do is just sit down and write for two to five minutes and then go back and read it out loud. [21:04]
Clean it up, make it shorter, and make sure that the first sentence that you're writing solves the problem, and then read it out loud again. [21:34]
Beyond preparing, be authentic and try out an idea with your friend before you start to move it out into the universe of people that you may want to be talking to. [22:52]
Everyone wants to do high-stakes PR and there are a lot of people who would love to be in that setting but once there you understand very quickly that it takes a lot of preparation and a lot of work. [23:55]
The biggest lesson for this month that I would encourage your listeners to think about is not to oversimplify communicating. [24:35]
There is a lot that communicators can do better including understanding the business of media. [26:19]
Reporters are swamped and are deadline-driven and so they have limited time to consume ideas and if you're telling them that your idea is the best idea ever then you better make sure you've done your homework on why it's newsworthy. [26:48]
We had the pleasure of working for some major fortune 100 companies and tech companies and it is remarkable to me how many people do oversimplify communication at every level, regardless of big or small. [28:50]
In my opinion, over the next year and a half in particular 2021, it is going to be about crisis communication so everybody needs to be prepared for that. [29:48]
I would recommend that every business, look at their crisis management plan and make sure that it reflects the lessons they learned in 2020. [30:05]
Crisis and bumps in the road or mistakes are an opportunity to discuss and communicate your values and talk about who you are, rather than getting so caught up in the fact that a crisis is happening. [30:15]
I think if more people can view these things as opportunities, then they are going to start to come out of them a little bit better. [31:19]
…………………………………………………
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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How To Money - Krisstina Wise

"The biggest fat lie is this belief that the answer to all money problems is to make more money." Krisstina Wise
Understanding how money works require deliberate action towards being financially literate and practice.  A financially balanced lifestyle is the dream of most people, but most people struggle to reach that dream because of a lack of grasp of money matters. Our guest today, Krisstina Wise, has lived on both sides and says that money management is a real-life skill that has the potential to transform financial outcomes for the better.
Krisstina Wise is a real estate mogul, Millionaire Coach, and creator of several multi-million-dollar businesses, including Goodlife Luxury, The Paperless Agent, and WealthyWellthy. She is an international speaker and author of the Amazon Bestseller Falling for Money, A Romance Novel For Your Bank Account. Named one of the 100 Most Influential Real Estate Leaders in the country, she has been featured in USA TODAY and by Apple, Contactually, and Evernote for her creative leadership with emerging technologies.
In today's episode, our guest will be talking to us about the importance of financial education in the journey of financial freedom. She will also be use numbers to provide us with insightful illustrations on wealth multiplication.
Listen in!
Social media links:
 https://linkedin.com/in/krisstinawise/  
https://twitter.com/krisstinawise  
https://www.instagram.com/krisstinawise/
What I help people with is in the category of money, which is a topic that has a lot of shame attached to it. [1:42]
Most of us have been programmed with the money mindset and belief structure by the time we're probably seven to 10 years old without realizing it, and we carry that money understanding or lack of way into adulthood. [1:54]
Money is knowledge-based, so we have to learn about money. It's a real-life skill, but the problem is it's not taught in school. [2:24]
The common sense, which is the obvious part, is that you work for your money, buy things, have bills, and spend money, and because we can do that pretty easily, it makes us think that that's all there is to it. [3:07]
There is so much more to it, and money has all these principles, laws, and mechanics. [3:21]
In all other categories of life, we would expect that we would have to learn and practice and apply that learning to produce the results that we want. [4:02]
What I find fascinating is that with the three or four most important categories of life, we don't do that same thing: our health, relationships and marriages, parenting, and money. [4:19]
I found myself in a state of crisis that kind of forced me to want to learn this money thing. [5:50]
People like me that have had no advantages have learned in-depth and dedicated my adult life to learning this thing to be good at it, and the result is financial freedom, where your assets pay for the cost of your living. [6:02]
I have a money school called sovereignty Academy, where I teach people how to money and get out of the trap by learning these very basic fundamental things that once we learn them and know them, we can land the plane successfully time and time again. [6:21]
The biggest fat lie is this belief that the answer to all my money problems is to make more money. [7:54]
There's a different way, and it's much easier, but you have to get out of the mindset and quit that thinking working harder or making more money is the answer. [10:08]
It is vulnerable for many different reasons, but it comes for many of us until we've schooled ourselves and educated ourselves. [11:07]
Being ignorant about money is not a bad thing; it just means we don't know yet, which can bring a lot of vulnerability. [11:40]
When it comes to money and relationships, we come from different backgrounds and have different beliefs, but it is all about finding the balance between spending and saving. [12:36]
Commercial break. [13:57]
My first tip is that if money causes some type of friction or keeps us up at night, the first thing to do is to get curious about learning. [15:13]
There are these fundamental principles and laws regarding money, and we can start to learn those now and make different choices. [15:30]
One of those principles is called Parkinson's Law of money which has kind of these two parts, and this is a law and a money commandment that is a truth that if you believe to be true, then it can be very eye-opening. [15:46]
The first part says that expenses will always rise to match income, and that is why it's a myth that working harder to make more money will solve your money problems. [16:09]
The second piece of Parkinson's Law says that once a luxury, it becomes a necessity. As our income goes up, our lifestyle, conveniences, and comfortability go up, and our status matches that. [17:58]
Having personal debt means that you are living a life that you can not afford under the illusion that you can afford it because it fits into your monthly amount of money that you can spend. [18:58]
I teach a philosophy that you should become your own banker and not participating in the banking system unless you're leveraging it very intentionally, strategically, and understandably. [20:04]
Money and time are the same things, and we need to buy time with our money instead of the other way around, which is through wealth creation. [20:28]
I have been buying and building my net worth over the number of years through acquiring my real estate assets, and it is the cash flow from those assets that fully fund the cost of my lifestyle, and that is what financial freedom is. [21:14]
I have been very intentional in using time on my side to over time acquire these assets with the goal that my assets would pay for the cost of my lifestyle. [21:30]
It is intentional, and you have to know how much money is enough by putting money into a compounding calculator. [21:48]
The money I invested over all those years bought my time today to do whatever the hell I wan [22:00]
When it comes to our kids, one of the best things we can do for ourselves is to learn this money game and play well and hopefully be able to teach or encourage our children because it's not taught in school. [22:25]
The early your start, the more time you have and the easier it is, you are going to make some early on beginner mistakes, but you have a lot of time to make up for those mistakes [22:42]
We need to create wealth not just for ourselves but also for our children because times are changing, and learning this money is more important than eve [28:26]
The only way to protect ourselves and provide as much opportunity, safety and security as possible is to educate ourselves. [28:39]
Make money a curiosity to get good at it. [29:55]
…………………
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Color Today Pretty - Stephanie Feger

"There are things you can't control, but you can allow yourself to find a deeper level of happiness, success, and fulfillment by shifting your perspective." Stephanie Feger
As social beings, we must acknowledge that we need to seek perspective while interacting and forming relationships. By having an open mind and a willingness to learn, we get to understand ourselves and others better. This is according to our guest today, Stephanie Feger, who believes that people need perspective to guide their actions.
Throughout her life, Stephanie Feger has been in the business of empowering people and helping others uncover the power to their success. However, it was a dream that left her with the charge to reframe how she saw her own life and encourage others to do the same. This dream became the catalyst for her to redefine her success, re-evaluate her personal goals and turn her "what-ifs" into "why-nots."
Stephanie is the author of 'Color Today Pretty: An Inspirational Guide to Living a Life in Perspective' and Color Today Pretty Guided Journal, where she shares her secrets to harnessing true perspective, the ones she has used to discover the difference between living an ordinary life and an extraordinary one. Through her speaking engagements, engaging workshops, and customized learning opportunities, she invites others to embrace perspective even when it may seem most challenging.
After working in the communications and marketing industry for years, Stephanie merged her unique expertise with her life's passions, founding the emPower PR Group, where she helps nonfiction authors write books that sell, promote their books to those who need and want them most, and build meaningful businesses built on messages that are empowering! Stephanie is also the host of The emPowered Author: Marketing for Nonfiction Authors podcast.
In today's episode, Stephanie will talk about her book and how it came to be. She will also dive deeper into why she believes having perspective is important both in personal and business.
Listen in!
Social media
 Websites: www.StephanieFeger.com , www.emPowerPRGroup.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/stephaniefegerpage  https://www.facebook.com/empowerprgroup
Twitter: https://twitter.com/emPowerPRGroup  
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stephanie-feger/  
https://linkedin.com/company/empowerprgroup  
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/colortodaypretty/
https://www.instagram.com/empowerprgroup/
Unlike many people who decide to grow up and become authors, I did not have a bucket list item to become an author. [4:54]
I had every intention to retire from the company I was working at for a decade, and through a serendipitous series of events, someone charged me with doing something different. [5:02]
I had been working in PR marketing for 15 years, so I just expected that would be what I always did, but we were impacted by a corporate layoff, which was the best thing for me. [5:32]
I decided to publish this book I had been writing that my friend charged me to continue doing, titled "Color Today Pretty," and has absolutely nothing to do with PR and marketing. [6:03]
The essence of the "Color Today Pretty" movement is all about re-evaluating success and helping women and men figure out how to find balance and have a truly fulfilled life. [6:25]
I had the opportunity to take this love for perspective, writing, authorship, and empowerment and blend it with marketing and PR to help authors, nonfiction authors specifically spread their words and help their books and messages reach those who want them and will buy them. [7:06]
I founded the Empower PR group, and I feel blessed to help all different types of nonfiction authors do that. [7:30]
Perspective isn't limited to personal life; rather, it has extensions in both personal and professional, and when you lead a life with perspective, it's crazy how what success looks like can be redefined. [7:49]
Perspective is so important, and even when something's so miniscule, if you have perspective, you can actually see deeper levels of happiness that come from it. [9:13]
I have found that writing a book is one thing, and marketing is completely another thing. [11:11]
As you're writing the book, it takes so much of you to get it out. It is such a vulnerable experience that you get exhausted and overwhelmed by the process. [11:28]
The essence of the emPower PR group is built on empowerment, and I have kind of two ways I do it. There is the done with you, which is a collaborative process, and then there's the done for you. [11:53]
The emPower PR group is built on the done with your process because I find that some of the most successful authors are the ones that realize they need to learn marketing. [12:07]
It is very important to me that authors are empowered with that knowledge because for a lot of authors their investment is very [12:31]
Since I've been there and understand, I'm very organized and don't believe in moving without a strategy. [12:53]
You do not want your book to be a want but a need because people budget for needs, which means your book automatically becomes something already in their budget. [14:57]
You have to take a step back, look through the lens of perspective, and figure out how you are fulfilling a solution for someone in a way that they need it, want it, and will buy it. [15:40]
Don't even try to be something for everybody; rather, focus on the people that need you and will be unapologetically directed towards them, then you're going to make a big difference there. [16:44]
Commercial break. [17:40]
You can't control things, but you can allow yourself to find a deeper level of happiness, success, and fulfillment by shifting your perspective. [20:55]
I do think that life can happen for a purpose and with purpose. [21:25]
When you sit back and reflect on what is happening, you don't have to be okay with what has happened, but you do get the opportunity to choose how you react and respond to it. [21:29]
What's beautiful about perspective is every moment you get to choose it, so when you're dealing with a hardship, take a moment, feel that grief and then make the conscious decision not to let that define you. [22:19]
From our perspective standpoint, when you talk business, perspective can drive strategy, which should lead your tactics. [22:55]
Just because we don't see things doesn't mean it's not happening, but it all boils back to perspective. [27:45]
In a world that can be overwhelming and exhausting, I challenge you not to give up, don't give in, don't give way but always give value because it will always come back to you. [29:43]
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Developing an Ethical Mindset - Yonason Goldson

"Instead of seeing differences as a source of contention, we should see an opportunity for great partnerships between people who are very different from one another." Rabbi Yonason Goldson
Whether written or not, the framework of ethics that underlies our existence remains a key determinant of the quality of lives that we live. It helps us make decisions that create desirable outcomes and steers us away from unjust outcomes. Our gust today, Rabbi Yonason Goldson, advocates for a culture of ethics at all levels and says that it all starts from understanding and defining what ethics means to us.
Yonason Goldson, director of Ethical Imperatives, LLC, works with leaders to create a culture of ethics that builds trust, sparks initiative, and drives productivity. He's a keynote and TEDx speaker, trainer, coach, and community rabbi, as well as a columnist and author, repentant hitchhiker, world traveler, and retired high school teacher in St. Louis. He has published hundreds of articles applying ancient rabbinic wisdom to the challenges of the modern secular world and six books, most recently "Grappling with the Gray: an ethical handbook for personal success and business prosperity."
In today's episode, our guest will talk about ethics and its role in having functional relationships at all levels. He will also give insights into the ethical qualities that a leader needs to cultivate for better outcomes.
 
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https://www.yonasongoldson.com/
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When we go into business, we're often very focused on what we want, or if we're a little more sophisticated, what we provide, but what we should also be thinking about is with whom we are dealing. [3:04]
Relationships are the foundation of all success in our personal lives, professional lives, and [3:17]
When we consider ethics, one of the problems we have is that we don't have a good definition of ethics, which means we don't know how we can be ethical people. [3:30]
What I've come up with is that ethics is the discipline of recognizing and taking responsibility for the impact our actions have on other people. [3:42]
In order to have that recognition and take that responsibility, we have to have a sense of who other people are, show them that we are trustworthy, and show that we are willing to trust them. [3:53]
Instead of seeing differences as a source of contention, we should see an opportunity for great partnerships between people who are very different from one another. [4:32]
If we're both good at the same thing, that means at least one of us is wasting our effort. [4:48]
Ethics is not nearly as much about what is the right thing to do but about contemplating what the right thing to do is. It is priorities, competing values, sensitivity to the spirit of the law, and not just the letter of the law. [5:18]
When we develop our ethical mindset, that's what enables us to approach all our relationships and decisions in an ethical way, which ultimately drives the greatest possible success in everything we do. [5:46]
We emphasize compliance, but it can become the enemy of ethics because if I relegate my decision-making to a code of rules, I don't have to think about whether it's really the right thing to do. [6:40]
When I finished college, I went backpacking across Europe and ended up in Israel. I had been raised with really no knowledge of what it meant to be Jewish. [7:10]
I was astonished to discover this vibrant culture of deep meaning, purpose, thought, and values, which changed the trajectory of my life. [7:20]
I bring that ancient wisdom into the modern secular world and show how the answers are all there; we have to update the language a little bit so that we can recognize how it applies to us and how it guides us regardless of our religious identity or affiliation. [7:33]
Jim Rohn famously says you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, and it's not just the friends. It is also what we consume in media. [9:00]
When traveling through Europe, I was on a train from Luxembourg to Cologne, Germany, and I shared a car with a German journalist and invited me into his home. [11:20]
To meet someone from that culture and learn about him as an individual, not as a label, is a memory that I've kept with me for 40 years. [11:55]
In my book, I used a formula that I use in much of my training, presenting ethical dilemmas of not trying to say it is right or wrong but trying to understand an issue from both sides and finding a middle way. [12:55]
It is broken up into social, business headlines, education, and the different areas of life where we have to grapple with the gray areas to make ethical decisions. [11:33]
Commercial break. [14:03]
It is all about taking responsibility for ourselves, recognizing the mistakes we've made, the areas where we could and should improve, and making a plan for moving forward. [15:30]
We know what we should do and what we want to do, but we don't plan how to put it into practice. [16:00]
My approach is, if we focus on our mindset and the behaviors will start to follow. [16:22]
I use ethics as an acronym to give characteristics that describe ethical leaders and ethical people. [16:32]
E is for empathy which entails knowing other people and being sensitive to them by understanding how our actions affect them. [16:45]
The T is Trust, where I demonstrate that I'm trustworthy and know that if I'm not willing to trust you, it will be difficult for you to trust me. [16:53]
The H is humility which Pastor Rick Warren defines as not thinking less of yourself but thinking of yourself less. [17:08]
The I is inquisitiveness or inquiry because leaders need to ask questions and not wait to be told or asked and not be given permission to serve. [18:24]
C is for courage because it is often difficult to do the right thing. [18:52]
S is self-discipline because building is a process, and when you get to the end, you start over again and keep building. [19:20]
This needs continued reinforced where I need to surround myself with people who are committed to ethical values. [20:40]
I am not going to get it right all the time, but it is a commitment to do and another opportunity to learn [20:52]
I recommend tapping into this eternal, timeless wisdom that we have access to in ancient teachings to fix our culture, fix our company's business, fix our summers, and fix our families and our communities. [24:45]
A few basic principles include showing trust to earn trust, telling stories of grappling with ethical challenges to inspire ethical behavior, and showing appreciation by celebrating the successes of others. [24:59]
Suppose we employ these simple principles, and learn how to turn these ideas into action. In that case, we can see our relationships improving, our businesses will be more profitable, our families will be more at peace, and our communities will be much more functional. [25:30]
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Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
Learn more: https://www.kukuabiz.com