Shock Your Potential

Your Personal Mission Statement - Georgia Woodbine

"Your mindset is the biggest barrier between what you want out of life, where you are now and where you're trying to be." Georgia Woodbine
The single most important step you can ever take in your life is cultivating the right mindset. This is because having the right mindset plays a crucial role in determining how you perceive and cope with challenges that life throws your way. Today, our guest, Georgia Woodbine, who lives to empower people to go after their best life, says that it all starts with a shift in the mindset.
Georgia Woodbine is one of the world's top female speakers and expert personal and professional development coach and has helped to motivate and inspire an entire generation. She is widely known as a change agent, author, lifestyle transformation coach, and dynamic and entertaining speaker. Georgia has been featured in media outlets such as; The Daily News, Huffington Post, Rolling Out Magazine, Sirius Radio XM.
Georgia created a curriculum and lectured at The Learning Annex, one of the premier producers of seminars, lectures, classes, and workshops throughout North America. She has also been a guest speaker at Time Warner Cable, Columbia University, Stony Brook University, Rutgers University, Howard University, Medgar Evers College, Monroe College, Georgian Court University, as well as a long list of other network organizations. She has authored several books and has over fifteen years of entrepreneurial business success as well as an extensive marketing background working in the entertainment industry with; Def Jam, PolyGram, WNYU Radio, WQHT-Hot 97, Black Enterprise Magazine, and the Apollo Theatre where she honed her management, promotions, and marketing skills.
Georgia created and developed a curriculum based on her book, "How to Choose Your Career Path: Charting Your Success," and lectured at numerous school districts and colleges to help prepare students with employment tools and life skills. She has been a life coach for over thirteen years and has trained and coached hundreds of people. In love with life, Georgia enjoys being an empowerment advocate for others to find their true purpose. She captures her audiences with her message of hope, inspiration, and the power of intention. Her passion continues to touch countless souls in their pursuit of happiness.
In today's episode, Georgia will talk about her personal journey and the evolution to becoming who she is today. She will also explain why a shift in mindset is the first step to changing all other aspects of your life.
Listen in!  
Social Media
Website http://georgiawoodbine.com/shop/  
Instagram https://instagram.com/georgiawoodbine/  
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/georgia.woodbine?ref=tn_tnmn  
Linkedin www.linkedin.com/pub/georgia-woodbine/29/412/5/Edit  
Twitter https://twitter.com/GWNetwork  
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLC6GbdCg3orQBN0QQnv4JdbEqyV4kwGu8 
I am a change agent, a lightworker, teacher, writer, author, speaker, and a lifestyle transformation coach. [3:04]
My mission in life is to empower others to live in their highest potential, share my personal journey, and teach them how to confront the things they want to change. [3:17]
One of the things I always teach as a life coach is that everybody should have a mission statement and when I say that to people, they look at me like I have two heads. [3:41]
A mission statement helps you stay focused, gives you clarity, helps you be in alignment, and allows you to prioritize your time based on what's important to you. [4:01]
Once you understand what that mission statement is, you can tap into your gifts, talents, natural abilities, skill set, and job experience, and you can pull all those things together to create the life you love. [4:18]
My personal journey on transformation began about 16 years ago at a point in my life where I was dealing with major [5:34]
When you are pushed up against a wall, and you see your life unraveling before your eyes, that's when you're forced to look deeper within and are forced to confront yourself and ask the tough questions. [ 5:52]
The most important question that I ever asked myself was, "Why am I here?" and that is tied to your purpose, your passion, and the things that bring you joy and [6:18]
Most people don't even realize that they either have a fixed mindset that comes from the belief that your qualities are carved in stone or a growth mindset that comes from the belief that you can create anything that you want at any given time. [8:00]
When you have a fixed mindset, you prefer to stay with what's familiar and tend not to try new things because you feel it's so hard or challenging. [8:21]
When you have a growth mindset, you believe that your qualities are things that you can cultivate through work and effort and that you can change anything at any given time in your life. [8:36]
You have a growth mindset when you embrace change and new opportunities, and you understand that when you're challenged, there's room for growth for you to evolve. [8:54]
When you have a growth mindset, they inspire you to try when you see someone else succeeding. [9:12]
It is so important for people to laser in and understand what kind of mindset they have to change it. [9:30]
Commercial break. [9:42]
Your mindset is the biggest barrier between what you want out of life, where you are now, and where you're trying to be. [10:57]
Sometimes in life, you have to retrain your mindset, including retraining your thoughts and belief systems. [11:14]
Society puts labels on us all the time, but it's really about finding out who you are, beyond those labels. [11:27]
The hardest thing for people is to understand who is the true self, but when you get to the place of the true self, you understand that you are authentic. [11:44]
I realized that I have come to the realization of my true self and that I have the power to create whatever I desire, which may not happen exactly when I wanted to, but it will happen. [12:14]
When you retrain your mindset, your thoughts cannot be incapable of what you were trying to create. [12:30]
You have to be aligned mentally, emotionally, physically if you're trying to manifest change in your life with what you're trying to create. [12:36]
The magic in my life began when I started to understand how to let go and living in the present moment, not worrying about your past and not fretting about your future. [13:58]
I love the quote by Dr. Dwayne Dwyer, which says, "when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at chang" [14:25]
When you achieve the things you want, you're going to desire more things, so it is important to understand your why and your motive behind why you do what you do. [15:00]
The first step to changing anything in your life is to change your mindset, and it is the first and most important step to achieving anything you want in life. [16:08]
You have to develop a plan of action because nothing happens until something moves. You have to take action steps daily to achieve whatever you want to achieve in life. [16:32]
Make a commitment to yourself and discover your true motivation behind why you want to achieve these goals. [16:44]
Understand that behind every goal lies a deeper meaning that is motivating your desire, and it is important to understand what that is. [16:55]
Take small steps, and don't be afraid to revise your plan and goal. If you take baby steps, you will not be so overwhelmed with trying to make this change happen soon, but you will be taking steps to make it happen. [17:03]
You have to learn how to simplify your life and once you learn to do that, you learn not to let things distract your purpose. [18:40]
When you are connected to that higher part of yourself, you learn to create the life you love by controlling your thoughts, feelings, and emotions. [19:05]
Always focus on your why because when you focus on your why you tend to focus on the things you want and less on the things you don't want. [20:46]
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Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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It's All About Who You Know - Nathan Perez

"The overall point in sharing information is that you're giving people something that they can be able to relate to, and you're doing it in a way that they can understand." Nathan Perez
Regardless of your profession or where you are in your career progression, the importance of networking can not be overlooked. When done right, networking can bring tremendous benefits both professionally and personally. For some people, networking may feel uncomfortable, but our guest today, Nathan Perez, insists that networking is not as complex as it has been portrayed and involves exchanging information.
Besides being a genuine and hardworking introvert, Nathan Perez is also an award-winning author, a national speaker, and an executive and job search career coach at career innovation. He comes from unusually unique and diverse professional backgrounds himself and has a rare viewpoint on networking and how that relates to job search and career development.
Nathan is a formerly trained actor with a bachelor's degree in fine arts and theatre. His 20-year career in the arts was supported by simultaneously developing a business career, which involved an inordinate amount of resumes, networking meetings, and interviews in multiple businesses and industries. Utilizing that background, Nathan ties together his deep live audience experience with almost 15 years in the executive search industry, delivering dozens of webinars, seminars, and guest speaking engagements each year on the topics of networking, job search, and career development.
Before his work as an executive career coach, Nathan held the title of Vice President of Research in the retained search industry, where he was responsible for the first step of the executive recruitment process, devising strategies of "where and how to find" qualified candidates for all national and global search engagements. Consequently, networking was and continues to be a day-to-day function of his job. As a result, and because of his combined professional expertise, Nathan regularly works with professionals from different backgrounds and experience levels. This includes everyone from Hollywood movie stars and producers to sound engineers, fashion designers, new college grads, non-profit and civic leaders, veterans, and senior global executives.
He has been cited by The Huffington Post as one of the most connected people on LinkedIn worldwide. He is a member of the Actors Equity Association union (AEA); a voting union member of The Screen-Actors Guild (SAG-AFTRA); the Author's Guild; and served as Vice Chair at The Loft Literary Center, the nation's largest literary and writing organization. He is an Honorary Commander with the 934th Airlift Wing, U.S. Air Force Reserve, home of the Global Vikings.
In today's episode, our guest will talk about why networking is the most important skill you need for career development. He will also provide us with insightful tips on how to get the best out of networking meetings.
Listen in!
Social Media
https://www.linkedin.com/in/nathanperez/  
https://www.linkedin.com/company/cipress  
https://www.facebook.com/Career-Innovations-Press-100479695381379/
I'm a professional speaker, an executive career coach, and I've been doing that for about eight years. [3:44]
Before that, I was in the executive retained search industry, where I found the executive candidates for the executive recruiters to go and recruit, so networking was a major function of my overall job. [3:49]
Before that, I spent 20 years in the entertainment industry as a professional actor and writer, formally trained in BFA Theatre Arts. [4:22]
In 2012, the last firm that I had joined, I met my co-author for the book, "20 Minute Networking Meeting," which eventually turned into three more editions. [4:41]
A combination of her experience in the retained executive search industry and my experience in the retained executive search industry combined with the entertainment industry, networking was a topic that she had brought up as a bucket list idea for a book, and we jumped all over it. [4:53]
All this has led to all the professional speaking in the workshops I do, where I give around 70 webinars and workshops per year. [5:12]
Most of my speaking is geared around networking, not just job search, but networking for anything, including sales, business development, marketing, whatever it may be. [5:21]
Currently, I work with universities, the military particularly the veterans, senior executives, and corporations, both for the corporations themselves and internally on building relationships. [5:33]
Sometimes we call it networking, but at the heart of networking is relationship building, and I work with them one-on-one and in groups. [5:48]
Networking is essential to just about everything, and I don't think we necessarily think about what we're doing to be [6:37]
The word networking has gained sort of this negative connotation because of the behaviors that have been associated with it over time. [6:48]
Networking is just the obtainment and exchange of information, and so we are doing it every day in every discussion that we ever have. [7:10]
When doing an elevator pitch, you can have something general for someone you don't know anything about. [11:45]
If you're intentional about your networking, you've hopefully researched someone and talk about your background in a way that's relevant to that person you're speaking to. [11:55]
The overall point in sharing information is that you're giving people something that they can relate to, and you're doing it in a way that they can understand. [13:36]
Commercial break. [15:08]
Networking is just about the obtainment of information. [16:47]
When it comes to running a meeting, there are five steps to it based on the 20-minute networking meeting. [17:06]
The first step is just a great first impression of you in the meeting. This could be over the phone or virtual, but basically, it's just a Hello. [17:23]
The next step is a 30-60 second snapshot of your background or your professional experience. [17:45]
Step number three is the great discussion and is the bulk of your meeting. This is about 12 to 15 minutes long, and it's comprised of five key questions. [18:11]
The first three questions are very specifically formulated for your contact from the research that you've done on your contact beforehand. [18:33]
Question number four is about expanding your network where you ask for more names because people want to help and because they said yes to your meeting, more often than not, people will give up those names. [19:24]
Question number five is the kind that takes your contact by surprise but in the best possible way. That question is, "how can I help you?" [20:15]
Step number four is wrapping up the meeting. [21:32]
Step number five is following up afterward, which can be immediate or ongoing follow-up. Ongoing follow-up is about keeping your network alive with time. [21:38]
Every little piece of information that we exchange eventually kind of adds up into a big pile, and that big pile can be reserved for a continued discussion with that person, or that bigger pile could be informing other little piles that inform other discussions with other [24:31]
There is never bad information, just what you do with it. [24:49]
Understand that this networking thing is just the obtainment and exchange of information, and we're doing it all the time. [25:55]
If you can look at it this way, then every discussion you're having is networking, and if you do something with the information, you will carve out a path for you wherever you want to go. [26:10]
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Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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How to Get Unstuck - Debra Levy

“Find the things that work for you because you are not like anybody else.” Debra Levy
Many times we get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life and we struggle to create the space and time for the things that matter most to us. However, in order to access the peace and freedom that comes with productive days, we have to be intentional about what we want our days to look like. Our guest today, Debra Levy, guides people in doing the work to make their days more fulfilling and says that it all begins with self-awareness.
Debra Levy, a Certified Life, Productivity & ADHD Coach, is the owner of A Life That Fits, LLC. She is dedicated to helping her clients make time and space for what matters most in their lives. Debra begins by working with her clients to clarify what is important to them, what will make them feel happy and fulfilled, and determining what guidance and support is required to create the life they want. She focuses on areas that are a struggle for many of her clients (whether ADD/ADHD or neurotypical) including time management, hyper-focusing, distractions, the setting of goals and priorities, and establishing healthy boundaries.
Together, she and her clients work on gaining insight into what is holding them back. She helps them to become more aware of their natural abilities, modalities, and tendencies, make room for their big-picture goals and implement step-by-step solutions to help them get from where they are, to where they want to be. Debra is here to partner with her clients on a thought-provoking and productive journey to envision “A Life That Fits” their values and dreams and provide the motivation and accountability to maximize their potential.
In today’s episode, our guest will talk about what her work is all about. She will also provide some tips and insights on how people can better plan for their time by being more realistic in their estimations.
Listen in!
Social Media
Website: https://www.alifethatfits.com/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/debraslevy/ 
https://twitter.com/alifethatfits 
https://www.instagram.com/alifethatfitscoaching/ 
https://www.facebook.com/alifethatfitscoaching/
I have transitioned from doing hands-on organizing to fully coaching now and I deal a lot with time management and productivity for people who are trying to feel less overwhelmed. [4:48]
One aspect is when people feel like they have no structure in their day or they've just too much gone on and they just don't know how to get it all done and need some help. [4:55]
Another is if they're trying to tackle some type of transition or big projects and need a little clarity and figuring out their next steps. [5:13]
I also do ADHD coaching where I go about executive functioning which is the way our brain regulates our behavior and helps us achieve our goals and manage our day. [5:34]
People are reaching out more now and there is a lot more awareness about adult ADHD. [6:44]
I try to help people to trust themselves again, and to see whatever way their brain is wired, that they have great value, and that they've got a lot of strengths just so that they feel empowered again, and not feel that they're lacking. [7:02]
Awareness is key and is the first step and once there is awareness, then someone can start to think about what they want to do with this awareness. [8:12]
When I am with our clients in a session, we talk about the actions they want to take at the end of the session. [8:25]
For those people who are very good at setting their structure, they are usually fine but the ones that had a lot of trouble were the ones that not only needed a structure in place but did not have any but also that needed that interaction socially, to be able to stay on board. [9:35]
So it is a matter of seeing who you are, and how you fit into the situation that makes a difference and that is what we explore a lot of times. [10:00]
There was a big learning experience for a lot of people going through this whole pandemic and if people were able to see the golden lining of this, it would be ideal. [11:20]
With that awareness, hopefully, people will be able to directly communicate what their needs might be to their employers. [12:25]
A lot of people reach out when trying to figure out how to get unstuck and so by discussing and talking through what their major overarching goals are, we figure out what they want to accomplish by the end of that call. [13:30]
We move them forward by being very action-based as well as figuring out these aha moments during the time. [15:14]
A lot of people do not trust in themselves to be able to make the decisions and they just have not felt the confidence so I help them to feel more empowered about doing that. [14:24]
Commercial break. [14:40]
A lot of my clients are dealing with their time management and so what I would like to talk about today is something that I go through with them when they are trying to figure out how to manage their day. [15:40]
A lot of people feel overwhelmed with managing their time and I find a big chunk of that has to do with estimating time. [15:56]
There is a concept that I learned called ramping up and down where people tend to feel that they have more time to do something than they do. [16:12]
I found that by experimenting with how they track their time, we can see how close they are to reality. [16:34]
A lot of people think that those extra steps you take before are a waste of time but it is part of the ramp and is very specific to what you have to take care of. [18:54]
One thing that I found is a great tool, which I use all the time with my clients is time timer. [22:21]
It is a great tool that helps people to visually see time disappearing and is awesome for those who do not have a great relationship with time. [22:30]
Find the things that work for you because you are not like anybody else. For your life to feel more fulfilled, you need to be able to build that toolbox that means something to you, will be consistent, and something that you enjoy. [24:30]
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Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
Learn more: https://www.kukuabiz.com
 

The Power of Network Marketing - Brian Dilsheimer

“Take a minute to take stock of where you are, and if you're not where you want to be, then you have to do something to change.” Brian Dilsheimer
A lot of people are programmed to accept and pursue only what they are familiar with which ultimately limits their options and outcomes. However, there are so much more opportunities that people can explore if only they can change their perspectives and be open-minded to different opportunities. This is according to our guest today, Brian Dilsheimer, who believes that change only starts from within.  
Brian Dilsheimer spent years in corporate America as a Sales and Marketing executive, managing billion-dollar brands including Cheerios and Nature Valley Granola Bars. He moved to a successful entrepreneurial career including many years as a real estate developer and homebuilder. For the past decade, he has helped others learn how they can be successful entrepreneurs themselves and establish a residual income stream to help them have the freedom to explore their personal and professional passions.
In today’s episode, our guest will talk about the opportunities in network marketing and how to cultivate the right mindset to succeed in this field.
Listen in!
Social Media
https://www.facebook.com/brian.dilsheimer/  
https://www.linkedin.com/in/briandilsheimer/  
https://www.instagram.com/dils11/
https://www.twitter.com/Dils_Kynect/   
Tik Tok: @dilsimpac
When I was first approached with this opportunity, I immediately declined because like a lot of people, I had a negative perception of network marketing or multi-level marketing. [3:24]
Because the person that brought it to me was somebody that I knew pretty well and I trusted, I was at least willing to listen. [3:44]
I heard the model which was all about helping people save money on services that they're using and that's a difference between what we do with ACN and Connect versus what a lot of network marketing companies do. [4:08]
I love the fact that we offer value on services that people in many cases are already using like electricity, natural gas, wireless. [4:30]
One service that we have right now that is, unfortunately, going to be the wave of the future is identity theft protection and we offer a chance for people to protect themselves in that situation and many other services as well. [4:44]
At the end of the day, what we do is we have a more efficient, go-to-market strategy and at the end of the day, I think it's more efficient to use word of mouth advertising as a way to share the virtues of a product or service. [6:01]
I think it is a great go-to-market strategy directly to the consumer, it cuts a lot of costs out and it is why these companies can be profitable and afford to pay some nice commissions at the same time. [6:48]
There are pros and cons like people that use those weight loss products, or, you know, they get passionate about it. And it's great, and you can find other people with the same needs, and you create a lot of passion. [8:04]
Sometimes with services, it's hard to manufacture that quite that same level of excitement about saving somebody a few bucks on their electric bill. [8:18]
I do think what gives it longevity and staying power is these are services that people are going to use forever which creates the opportunity for real residual income. [8:26
I don't mind working hard, but I love to work and then get paid for something over and over again. [8:56]
It is also the opportunity to create leverage with very low overhead and so create that residual income, leverage the efforts of others by having a team environment, but yet not have a lot of the risks associated with traditional businesses. [9:54]
It is pretty simple to sign up for as you have all the infrastructure already built for you. [10:35]
These companies spend a lot of time energy and money, putting together the backbone that's going to assist you and support you so that you have all the tools and the training and support that you need. [10:49]
I think that this is like anything else in the world; you have to work because you get out of it what you put into it. [11:00]
The good news is every kind of person succeeds in this business, and the only thing that they have in common is they believe in the opportunity, and they're willing to consistently talk about it. [11:38]
Commercial break. [12:15]
I have been involved with Connect for a long time and we just recently were acquired by a company called ACN. [13:15]
ACN has been around for a long time, they have a 28-year track record and were built by network marketers, and they offer 14 services in 27 countries. [13:26]
For the first time to get an opportunity to be global, super excited about that and we were excited to help them build that for the next 28 years. [13:38]
What I always like to talk about is the mindset and sometimes we are conditioned in a certain way to go get an education, go get a job work for 40 years, and create that stability, and hopefully, we can retire at some point. [14:08]
It is hard to get past conditioning especially when it's something that may not have the best perception. [14:34]
It is really important to look at everything from a fresh perspective and get all of the information and apply it to what's important to you. [15:02]
We all have stuff that keeps us up at night, and ultimately, you have to make your own decision as to whether something fits for you and whether it makes sense. [15:32]
The other thing that I would try to teach is sometimes you don't have to reinvent the wheel, there are systems in place that work, follow the people that have been before you ask questions, watch, listen, learn, and then apply that information. [16:38]
In network marketing, you are your own boss where you make your own hours and you do have to be consistent to be successful. [17:20]
The key is, one, take a minute to take stock of where you are. And if you're not where you want to be, then you have to do something to change. [20:56]
If you decide that you need some sort of a change, explore your options, look at network marketing, look at other options, but it's never too late. [21:07]
Make goals around what you want to be and make some changes where necessary, I think that you can be in a whole different place 12 months from now than you are today. So don't let that opportunity get by. [21:48]
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Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Embodiment Coaching - Morgan Doman

"It is really important to make time to get in touch with ourselves." Morgan Dorman
People-pleasing can be manifested in very many different ways.  One common outcome is that it usually leads to bitterness and resentment. Many reasons can lead a person to be a people pleaser, but one key component that can help cure this habit is becoming self-aware. Our guest today, Morgan Doman, uses embodiment coaching to help people overcome the driving factors to people-pleasing and says it all starts with being in tune with your body and desires.
Morgan Doman is a Life and Clarity Coach, and she helps people-pleasers to gain clarity and confidence to grow into inspired leaders and entrepreneurs. She has years of experience in the non-profit sector which has given her a deep-rooted knowledge of how to combine business with values. Morgan is certified by the Human Potential Institute and specializes in embodiment and transformational coaching. She loves to coach and to find clarity and then support her clients in taking action to create their life.
In today's episode, Morgan will talk about her work of coaching people-pleasers and expound more on why self-awareness is key in breaking this habit. She will also give us tips on practicing self-awareness and getting more in touch with our bodies.
Listen in!
Social media handles:
https://www.instagram.com/morgan.doman/  
https://www.facebook.com/morgandomancoaching/  
https://www.morgandoman.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCqZdYnAEBfZ_PBNGhyxA48Q?view_as=subscriber 
My biggest and most powerful tool is embodiment coaching, and that's how I shock people forward by helping them get in tune with their bodies. [2:15]
People pleasers tend to be incredible at scanning a room and knowing how to please everybody, but they tend to be very out of tune with their bodies and [2:28]
People pleasers can live a whole life doing what everybody else wants, and they have no idea what they want. [2:44]
That's why it is all about clarity and knowing what you want, but sometimes it's also just about the little things, too, like just living the life you want to live. [2:52]
I get people totally burnt out and feeling horrible and sick a lot of the time and just feeling like there's no joy. [4:20]
That was certainly the case for me three years ago, when I started in this area because I think we connect to that feeling of complete burnout. [4:39]
A lot of my work is also with mothers and with moms just helping them start to take care of themselves. [4:49]
People pleasers tend to not do anything for themselves, and if they do, it is often to serve someone else. [4:55]
I had to get sick and burnt out so that I could help myself. And then, of course, it set me on my journey helping other people do this. [5:46]
Human beings need balance, and so it's really important to bring that balance. [6:58]
I have this other part of my business, where I help entrepreneurs create and design their business to work for them and the life they want. [7:24]
Often, when entrepreneurs take time off, it's never actually used to be with [8:55]
It is really important to make time to get in touch with ourselves, and the more we do, we don't tend to burn out because we're resting in our dreams and desires. [9:18]
The really beautiful thing about a coaching space or a therapist space is that we actually can express those emotions without judgment, which in and of itself is kind of hard to find in this society. [10:21]
There is a lot of self-awareness around what happened in childhood because of this need to people please, overwork, and over-control. Our environment is always attributed back to patterns we learned in childhood. [10:35]
Commercial break. [12:10]
The more self-aware we are, the more we can do what's right and move forward on our path. [13:10]
My favorite way of doing this is to close my eyes and put my feet firmly on the ground, take a few deep breaths in so in through the nose and out through my mouth and then tune in to whatever I'm [13:48]
I love to teach people pleasers and recommend tuning into your body and not your head and identifying the feelings around this. [15:10]
The more self-aware we are, the more we can see our patterns and start following our journey through our life. [15:55]
Embodiment work is the key, especially when someone is so disconnected from their body. [18:56]
I always tell people to spend a whole day not caring about other people's feelings and see what happens. [21:13]
Remember that you only have one life, and you deserve to live it at your fullest potential and to be able to create the life of your dreams. [22:22]
That's your birthright and every human comes with onto this planet. So, if you need it, this is your invitation to shock your potential and live your life. [22:39]
…..….……………......…
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Asymmetry & Success - John Vespasian

"Whatever you do, or whatever your talent or profession is, you will do much better if you deploy your assets in the right configuration." John Vespacian
There are many reasons why history matters, and when history is perceived from a biographical point of view, the stories start to be more relatable and the lessons more applicable at an individual level. Our guest today, John Vespacian, approaches history from this very interesting angle and enables people to see historical patterns that enhance their understanding and insights on how to solve the problems they presently face.  
John Vespasian is the author of eleven books about rational living, including "When everything fails, try this" https://amzn.to/3xVdAbM (2009), "Rationality is the way to happiness" https://amzn.to/3spQbOL (2009), "The philosophy of builders" https://amzn.to/3CSBoRq (2010), "The 10 principles of rational living" https://amzn.to/3iOlI9P (2012), "Rational living, rational working" https://amzn.to/3xSJWUS (2013), "Consistency: The key to permanent stress relief" https://amzn.to/3z7TGfr (2014), "On becoming unbreakable" https://amzn.to/3iOKk2i (2015), "Thriving in difficult times" https://amzn.to/3xW55NP (2016), "Sequentiality: The amazing power of finding the right sequence of steps" https://amzn.to/3iSZ1kN (2017), "Undisrupted: How highly-effective people deal with disruptions" https://amzn.to/3k06ldZ (2019), and "Asymmetry: The shortcut to success when success seems impossible" https://amzn.to/3iPwEnM (2020).
Vespasian has lived in Germany, Italy, France, Spain, and The Netherlands. His books combine his passion for history, investing, and personal development, reflecting his philosophy of rational living, productiveness, and respect for the individual. The purpose of Vespacian's work is to draw practical lessons from history and believes that if a person wants to make good decisions, they have to look at the big picture and learn from the wisdom accumulated in centuries of human experience. He argues that knowledge is the only valid response to stress, the only formula that can make a person more effective. His books contain the wisdom he has accumulated in decades of research, and he believes that it is all about learning from other people's successes and mistakes and figuring out how to apply those principles to your own life. In every book, Vespacian goes through biographies and historical events with the goal of extracting from them lessons that people can use right now.
In this episode, our guest will tell us more about his approach to history and how he uses the lessons to educate people on handling present situations. He will also highlight a few of the biographies in his book and the lessons derived from them.
 
Listen in!
Social media handles
https://sites.google.com/view/assymetry/home  
https://www.facebook.com/john.vespasian
https://twitter.com/JohnVespasian  
http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B00IP34FJQ  
http://johnvespasian.blogspot.com/
https://sites.google.com/view/asymmetry-detailed-info/home
 
What I do is combine my history with personal development. [2:58]
Each of my books contains the essence of short biographies of people from different professions, centuries, and countries. [3:03]
I try to extract the patterns of success and the patterns of failure by analyzing real stories from real people, which I consider to be a very practical approach to history. [3:13]
I look at history as a major teacher of thinking patterns of behavior of human nature where if you don't learn from history, you are likely to repeat the same mistakes that people made centuries ago. [3:40]
Unfortunately, the history we learn at school is usually presented in a very useless way, which makes people very frustrated with it. [3:55]
I am trying to change this pattern in my books by having a perspective of history that is super practical and entertaining because I try to extract from each biography key points that people can use today in their daily lives. [4:07]
My latest book titled asymmetry contains the message that to be successful in life and get something done, it is much easier to do it if you take an asymmetric approach giving the example of Mozart, a very famous musician. [4:46]
A lesson from the book is that whatever you do or whatever your talent or profession is, you will do much better if you deploy your assets in the right configuration. [7:44]
In the book, I analyze in great detail, how Hannibal who was a general, fought against the Roman Empire very successfully for almost 20 years with fewer soldiers in a foreign territory. [7:57]
A very important lesson from history is that you should not get discouraged because you have fewer resources, are less experienced, or have fewer contacts than other people. If you deploy what you have in the right configuration, you can multiply your effectiveness. [9:06]
Another lesson from the book is from using chess players to compare their actual lives with their way of playing chess. [ 9:55]
There is a great component of personal style when you play chess, as it is a game that allows people to deploy their personalities. [10:12]
It is very interesting to see from the great masters how they manage to win when they're playing chess, especially when they had everything against them. [10:22]
In the book Asymmetry, I recount the story of Alekhine, who was a grandmaster or world champion, in the 1920s and 1930s, before the Second World War. [10:34]
The biography is fascinating because one of the things you learn from his personal life and his way of playing is that you will have situations in life where you can't figure out the right strategy because you don't have all the elements or the situation is too complex. Still, you will eventually find an opening and win the battle by taking small initiatives and testing the waters. [10:56]
Commercial Break. [12:54]
It is very important that in life, you get the right perspective, and for most people, this is going to be 85 years to try to see progress in perspective, because otherwise, it's very easy to go crazy, it's very easy to become desperate if you take a very short-term perspective. [14:15]
If you take this perspective, you will see your problems from a different perspective as long as you keep using your time effectively and try to improve the situation little by little; after a few years, you will not even remember. [15:13]
One thing that I am very skeptical about in my books is positive thinking in the way that most people understand it. [16:42]
People don't realize that positive thinking is very dangerous unless coupled with rational and consistent action because it makes people super anxious. [17:18]
It is much better to have a low-key approach to try to come up first with a solid plan and objective you can pursue, and then you will have plenty of time to become enthusiastic. [18:02]
The results of the analysis are that most successful careers are asymmetric. This is very important to understand because when you analyze the lives of successful people in history, you see that many of them became successful after failures. [19:24]
When you look at the biographies in detail, you will see the enormous amount of failure and distress. It is only by doing asymmetric strategies, trying different things, and focusing on what works that people will emerge successful and happy. [21:32]
Another aspect that I often underline in my books is that you have to find sustainable ways to take care of your health before you become sick. [22:29]
I spend a lot of time researching Ancient Medicine, especially herbal medicine and ancient Greek medicine. I have to tell you that the principles of maintaining your health have been known since ancient Greek and haven't changed a lot despite new technology. [23:14]
When you go to Ancient Greece and see that people lived fairly long and were able to stay healthy with very few resources, there are important lessons to draw. [23:39]
One of the good habits I think everybody should acquire because it's very inexpensive and beneficial is to get used to drinking herbal tea such as chamomile, mint, sage. [23:52]
Whatever business you do, wherever your profession or career, you have to find a way by looking at your processes, dedication, and time allocation to develop asymmetric advantages. [25:59]
You have to spend time identifying the steps that add most of the value to what you're doing and try to focus and optimize on those. [26:26]
I have the biography of Velasquez, a very famous artist in the 17th century, and he made a fortune just because he changed his procedure. [27:17]
It would be best to spend some time per month, maybe a couple of hours, trying to read some history or something that you find interesting to gain some perspective. [30:25]
It is a very good investment which will make you much more logical in your thinking and much more relaxed because you will get the perspective of the centuries [30:58]
….………...………
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Loyalty Vs. Royalty - Rick Messing

"Loyalty is at the bottom of human relationships, and the way to become the most effective human being is to become purely loyal to everybody." Richard Messing
When addressing chronic problems, organizations often struggle to acknowledge the complex human component. Most often, you will find that organizations solve these problems by understanding and learning the language and logic required to address the human condition. This is according to our guest today, Richard Messing, who believes that it all starts by getting the organization's belief system right.
People are seeking greater meaning, freedom, and growth in their personal and professional lives. Because the source of freedom, meaning, and growth is poorly understood, they are often difficult to achieve and maintain. For this reason, in 2004, Richard Messing embarked on a research project culminating in The Ethic of Human Repair, the intellectual property that documents the underlying principles and methods that describe, explain, and solve chronic personal or organizational problems where human freedom, meaning, and growth pertain.
Richard is a published writer, invited conference speaker, and thought leader on the human condition in general and free will in particular. In 2019, Richard formed Kotel Group LLC, an ethics-based business consulting firm, to rehabilitate and transform chronically underperforming for-profit or non-profit organizations that resist conventional management interventions and methodologies. In 2020, Richard established the ethics-based Kotel Business Community and believes it is impossible to master this essential and ethical business concept without the key insight that the human condition is fundamentally paradoxical.
In today's episode, our guest will talk more about the human condition and its importance in solving organizational problems. He will also give insights into loyalty and why he considers it the fundamental basis for meaningful and successful human relationships.
Listen in!
Social media
 https://www.linkedin.com/in/richardmessing/  
https://www.facebook.com/Kotel-Group-LLC-114607453623705/
 
I became fascinated with the idea that problems become chronic because it meant that people had tried many different things, even the most conventional methods, but they can't seem to crack the problem. [ 3:25]
I wanted to find out what causes a human problem to become chronic. [3:49]
Sixteen years ago, I just started my research project, and what I do is coming to help the client when they have unsuccessfully tried to solve their problems with their people. [4:14]
I teach my clients something about the human condition that they don't understand, which is that the human condition is paradoxical, and when you learn this, you learn a language and logic that you can use to analyze your chronic problems, then start to resolve. [4:46]
A false belief is when you believe something is true when it's actually false and when this happens, the information you're believing is true now lives inside your nervous system as true. [6:12]
Our nervous system uses our belief system to generate our perceptions, which determines our behavior. [6:37]
I teach my clients that they have a false belief about their own business and how to manage people and that's why they're having this chronic problem. [7:26]
I then teach them how false beliefs work and why they create chronic problems, and after that, we can then start analyzing their false beliefs and correct them. [7:45]
When a client of mine is so certain about why they have their problem, I challenge them that if they were right, they would be able to solve the problem. [8:48]]
I teach people and show them that you can have a perfectly sensible, common sense explanation for something completely false. [9:06]
I am not afraid to challenge my clients right from the beginning, and I believe that they wouldn't be hiring me if they knew what they were doing. [10:28]
People will either open up and be willing to be coached, or I can't help them. [11:01]
A coach can't be afraid to confront and challenge their client, and if there's an ounce of fear in the coach, he's not going to be an effective coach. [11:32]
Commercial break. [13:30]
I did a little research and discovered that loyalty and royalty are the same words, except for the first letter. [15:01]
Loyalty is at the bottom of human relationships, and the way to become the most effective human being is to become purely loyal to everybody. [18:29]
The definition of loyalty is to put the commitments of others first and not for your gain, and this is the ethic of service. [18:50]
When you do that, you show up as their asset, which creates value, much more value than it costs to maintain. [19:44]
You may have a business contract with them which is a trade and has nothing to do with loyalty, and therefore that's not what counts. [20:15]
What counts is your loyalty and whether or not you will do whatever you can to help them fulfill their commitments. [20:37]
When they perceive you that way, you become their asset, and they will want to keep you around, and your kingdom will grow. [20:47]
The secret to becoming a fully loyal human being is paradoxical, where you need to ask yourself whether you are a selfless or selfish person. [21:10]
Most people are both, and it is human nature to be both selfless and selfish. 21:23]
The master, who is the trusted adviser, knows when that little voice in his head says to him, "What am I getting out of this?" That's the voice that's going to cause you to become loyal. [21:30]
You can't become loyal in order to gain personally because that is being selfish. [21:48]
A master understands the paradoxical nature of the human division, so you have to watch out for that and ask what kind of human being you want to be. [22:45]
My suggestion is to commit and declare to yourself that you will be 100% loyal to everybody, which after thinking through, I realized that there is no downside to that. [23:05]
In the olden days, people would shake hands, which would create a bond of trust, but today, lawyers have to have the contracts and write up the contracts. [24:26]
You can't write a contract about loyalty or put it in the book. It has to be created, and you have to interact with your employees and your clients, and prospective clients as a loyal person. [24:55]
If you do it to create demand, now you're selfish and it is called mixed motivations, which is why people don't trust other people. [25:40]
We are talking about the nature of the human condition, and loyalty is human, and if you become that kind of a human being, it will communicate, and people will get it. [28:19]
Once you have achieved and have all of your personal needs met, spend the rest of your life figuring out how to serve other people. [29:51]
Let your life be about serving others, and your kingdom will grow, and you will be taken care of guaranteed. [30:15]
…..….……………........…
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Today‘s Choices Are Tomorrow‘s Outcomes - John Davis

"Life is about motion, and so you have to keep moving forward and trying something new." John Davis
Our perception plays a crucial role in how we recover from life-altering events. Being able to focus on the moment can allow us to transcend these experiences and challenges and come out better than we were. Our guest today, John Davis, is a living example of what positive focus and remaining present in the moment can do to turn misfortunes into opportunities to achieve greatness.
At 22 years old, John Davis' spine broke in half, dashing his dreams of being a Stuntman, Fight Director, and Martial Artist. Doctors told him he might never walk again, and if he did he could never have a physical career. Using what he now calls the "Five F Formula," John Overcame the limiting beliefs of others and brought himself back. He went on to perform over four thousand live comedy sword fighting stunt shows worldwide, including performing more than one hundred shows on the most remote bases in both Iraq and Afghanistan on six USO tours.
He is now an internationally known Speaker, Comedian, Fight Director, and Action Hero. As an international entertainer, John has traveled extensively throughout the world speaking to audiences of all ages and backgrounds in 30 countries and over four thousand live performances. John encourages his audiences to set and reach their highest potentials and awaken their inner action heroes!
In today's episode, John will talk about his life journey and the events that led him to who he is today. He will also give insights on how to be positive in life and kick out fear by implementing what he refers to as the five Fs.
 
Listen in!
Social Media
https://www.corporateactionhero.com/   
https://www.facebook.com/CorporateActionHero/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/corporateactionhero/  
http://www.twitter.com@jdactionhero/  
https://www.youtube.com/c/JohnDavisActionHero
 
Back when I was a kid, I wanted to be a swashbuckler, and I was fortunate I had 1000s of acres of woods behind my house, which I knew every square inch of it. [3:10]
I ended up getting drugged to a Renaissance Festival and started working on a Renaissance Festival in Maryland. [3:33]
I met two of the top fighters in the country who gave me a great gift: a series of positive reinforcement that I had never gotten from my alcoholic and abusive father. [3:38]
I ended up having these two gentlemen, who were just incredible men, also say to me that they thought I had talent as an actor and a combatant, and they ended up giving me all their training for free. [3:50]
I was feeling really good about myself and was going for my black belt, and at that point, I was strong. I was buff, and I was feeling like a rock-hard, masculine guy. [4:03]
A buddy of mine asked me to go over to his house and help unload his van, and I agreed. [4:23]
He had a van filled with 80-pound boxes of clay. I picked up the very first box, and as I turned to set it outside of the van, my spine broke in half due to the twisting action. [4:34]
At the hospital, the doctor said that I had a condition called spina bifida and would probably never walk again. Even if I did, I definitely would never have a physical career and needed to change my [4:51]
I was lying in that bed in the hospital, and a friend of mine came in, and he brought me a book to read, written by Bruce Lee, the greatest martial artist that ever lived. [5:22]
When Bruce wrote that book, as I came to find out, he was in traction in the hospital and had just been told he'd never do martial arts again. [5:46]
I started reading that book, and it was about his philosophy on martial arts, not about a technique where I found a couple of things that I latched on to quickly. [6:06]
One of them was staying in my present moment, and the other was mental flexibility. Whenever adversity comes up, by staying very flexible in those moments, you can achieve anything. [6:15]
Because I had to stay very present, I could not invest in the future that the doctors were giving me; I couldn't take their beliefs but my own belief. [6:25]
I started flexing the muscles of my upper neck and slowly over the course of a month, flexed all the muscles down my back until I got to my injury. [6:42]
I started flexing my hips, which was below the injury, and the doctors were blown away since within a month, I was moving the hips that they thought we never move again. [6:51]
A couple of weeks later, I was able to sit up, walk down the hallway, and go to the bathroom on my own, and then at a year, I was back to what I would say was normal physicality. [6:59]
I did not take the doctor's belief and did what I had to do, and after a year and six months, I was back to my full physical self. [7:33]
I'm fortunate because I was raised as a young Catholic boy, and when I turned 18, my mother told me that spirituality is a personal journey and that I needed to find my [8:37]
I traveled all over India and all through the Middle East, and studied every form of spirituality I could find, and I found the universal truth in all of it. [8:50]
When I look back at what I did to get out of that bed right now, I come back to a couple of things. [9:00]
Buddha says, 'what you think, you become, you create your world,' Gandhi says, 'You must be the change you want to see in your world,' the Bible says, 'as a man thinketh so is he,' and Jesus said 'whatever you ask in God's name will be granted.' [9:04]
Moses said God's name is 'I Am', and I am is your present moment, not your 'I will be' or 'I was' and so you have to sit and get into that present moment and realize that you are the creator of that experience. [9:17]
All this manifested in the rest of my life, where I became a professional stunt man and did everything I have ever wanted to do. [9:47]
What I do now is I go into corporations, and I awaken the interaction heroes in their teams and get them moving. [10:12]
When I was doing my comedy show, I found I was enjoying the time off the stage more than I was on the stage because I was sitting in the audience talking to people awakening their interaction heroes and getting them over their adversity. [10:20]
I go as a corporate action hero, and I bring something so unique, which are whips and dump trucks and comedy, into a program. [10:45]
The final thing I do in my main keynote speech is I pick the timidest person I can find in my audience, I bring them to the stage, and in under five minutes, that person learns to crack a whip and hit targets out of my hand. [10:56]
When you look at your life, you only have one moment that you can do thought, word, and deed, and all your past is memories of present moments, and so many people sit at this moment, and they live in the victim mode those past moments. [12:04]
The problem with negative people is they live in victim mode and are focused on victim mode, and therefore their subconscious mind shows them victim mode, which puts them in this never-ending treadmill of negativity. [13:04]
The only way to break that cycle is to take your present moment and start stacking positive, successful present moments. [13:15]
Going into a new school year, students and teachers are looking at this year coming up, and they think it is daunting, but the successful outcome of this year isn't going to appear magically in your present moment. [13:26]
Your key is to stay here in this moment and make it as positive and successful as possible, and that outcome will come and surround your present moment experience. [13:47]
I was the overweight, introverted kid who was bullied through entire schools at that time, and so when I look at the kids going back to school right now, I feel for the ones who feel marginalized. [14:33]
Life is about motion, and so you have to keep moving forward and trying something new. [15:30]
Commercial break. [15:50]
I have a hard time with negativity because I'm such a positive person, and I've walked in my life with a smile on my face, which is fascinating by life. [17:01]
The number one thing that stops everybody from achieving their goals is how you manage fear. [18:33]
One of the quickest and easiest ways to get out of your way is to realize a couple of things. [18:48]
When you break down fear scientifically, it is an emotional reaction to some future event that may or may not happen. You focus on a negative outcome because you wouldn't be afraid if you were focused on a positive outcome. [19:20]
When people feel like they're in fear and feel like they can't breathe, it is a mental state but not a real state, and once you believe you are in something, you can not control it. [21:36]
When you take the second to exhale and label it, it becomes an external thing and now you can do whatever you want with it, which is important. [21:48]
Apart from releasing fear, you have to focus, and then you have to work on your belief, faith, and [21:58]
Sometimes faith is only developed by results over time where you start stacking present moment successes, and your faith build [22:16]
The last one is flexibility, where when something comes up that seems contrary to what you're trying to achieve, you have to stay flexible on those moments. [22:33]
When I look at this from the perspective of the conscious and subconscious mind, If I'm focused on a goal, and my subconscious mind shows me something that seems like it's going to stop me from getting to my goal, I have to keep my mind in play stay focused on the goal so that my subconscious mind shows this to me. I have to clear any obstacle out of the way. [22:48]
If you're focused positively, you can achieve anything you want in your life, so you have to fearlessly focus with faith and follow through with flexibility. [23:12]
Today's choices are tomorrow's outcomes, so take today and make it positive and successful and make good choices. [25:06]
When one of the moments doesn't go well, don't beat yourself up because beating yourself up is just wasting the next moment. [25:15]
…………………………………………………
Thank you to our January sponsor!  KukuaBiz can provide dedicated and affordable talent from Kenya to help you grow and scale your business. Virtual employees are skilled in administrative functions, sales, podcast management, video editing, marketing, social media marketing, website design and management, and more.
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Courageous Dialogues - Charmaine Hammond

"We have to make sure that people understand how to collaborate effectively and have the tools and resources to do it." Charmaine Hammond
In order to enable the achievement of mutually agreed goals, people have to foster interactions that promote collegiality, trust and respect. This is especially crucial in the workplace where cooperation between colleagues is required to perform the shared responsibilities effectively. Our guest today, Charmaine Hammond has worked in environments characterized by conflicts and says that collaboration is key in ensuring conducive work environments.
Charmaine Hammond, CSP (Certified Speaking Professional) is a highly sought-after business keynote and workshop speaker, entrepreneur, author and educator who teaches and advocates the importance of developing trust, healthy relationships and collaboration in the workplace. She has helped clients in many industries build resilient and engaged workplaces, develop high trust/high accountability relationships, and solve workplace issues and conflict that gets in the way of success and profitability. She is respected as a "no fluff" and "rich content" speaker who delivers tangible tools to step into action immediately. Delivering her programs in person and virtually (she is a Certified Virtual Presenter through eSpeakers), she brings results and facilitates change.
Charmaine is a former Correctional Officer (yup! She worked in jails) and Corporate Dispute Resolution Expert and now travels the world teaching the principles of collaboration, communication/conflict resolution and resilience. She also has an extensive background facilitating processes to help collaborations and workplace/team relationships when they go sideways. As a former mediator, she has helped facilitate some of the most complex collaborations and partnership arrangements. She has also been called to several communities that have experienced disasters to help rebuild resilience and recovery processes.
Charmaine has a Master's Degree in Conflict Management & Analysis, is a bestselling author (of 5 books & featured in 6 others), and CSP™ Certified Speaking Professional. She has also been featured in renowned publications such as Inc., Occupational Health & Safety Magazine, and many others and appeared as a guest on numerous TV and Radio Programs. She is Executive Producer of an animated film, Back Home Again, which will be released in fall 2021, features an all-star voice cast of many widely known celebrities. This movie (and movement) was designed to be a conversation starter about mental health and community.
In today's episode, Charmaine will talk about her experiences dealing with conflict resolution at different organizational levels and contexts. She will also provide insights on the importance of fostering collaboration in team settings.
Listen in!
Social Media:
https://www.facebook.com/CharmaineHammondSpeaker/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/charmainehammond
https://twitter.com/hammondgroupbiz  
https://www.instagram.com/charmaine_hammond
After I left the jail system, I went back to school and became a mediator, and I was mediating conflicts in family, community and workplaces. [3:00]
I fell in love with working for non-profit organizations, and then I ventured into working in mental health, where I worked in various capacities. [3:21]
At one point, I even volunteered with my dog, a therapy dog, and we volunteered in a psychiatric hospital, and it was so powerful. [3:31]
And all of these experiences led to what I do now, which is speaking, training and facilitating teams, groups, project committees, on how to collaborate better, work better together, remain resilient in changing times, and also how to resolve those tough issues that get in the way of success, conflict being one of them. [3:42]
I get to work in these workplace environments and on projects where I get to tie in all of my skill sets and all of the things that, I believe, helped me shock other people's potential. [4:04]
We also work with entrepreneurs, non-profits, and service clubs, to help them raise their dreams and fund their projects through collaboration. [4:22]
One of the challenges that I had when I was preparing to leave the correctional system role as a correctional officer and move into a different career was that many of the ways we handled conflict don't work in other situations. [5:58]
I went back to school and learned communication and conflict resolution. A lot of the training we had in corrections was related to crisis, not necessarily the negotiation part of working through a tough issue. [6:25]
It taught me a lot about humility, being humble, the importance of respect, and how it can change everything when you show up at a tough time in someone's life. [6:43]
All of these softer lessons led me to fall in love with a structured process to resolve conflict, which is why I went back to school to become a mediator. [6:54]
My biggest learning was the power of listening to what is and is not being said. [7:14]
So, when you hear people in conflict talking about what matters to them, what's driving their position, what their underlying interests are, the ability to resolve the issue is so much easier because you're getting to the core of what matters. [7:21]
I realized that prior to that, I was always dealing with things on such a basic surface level, and you have to go deeper in conflict, and that is one of the reasons it is uncomfortable for both of us. [7:35]
We need to look at resilience building, conflict resolution, communication and stress management, not as soft skills training but as essential skills. It is a softer approach to dealing with human issues, but they are essential skills. [9:25]
Commercial Break. [10:43]
These courageous dialogues don't happen because people don't know how to get the conversation going, so what happens is, it's avoided. [12:11]
One of the things that I've learned is that as humans, we're typically pretty forgiving, where if you are providing feedback to someone and it doesn't land right, that is an opportunity to say I'm sorry and clarify your intentions. [12:35]
I have learned that whatever these conversations are that require us to be courageous, it sets the stage for a much better conversation. [13:45]
I feel like now more than ever, collaboration in the workplace is essential to help teams shock their potential. [16:19]
Not everybody is naturally a collaborator. Many of us prefer to work independently or in a pair instead of a group. [16:57]
In high performing teams, the ingredients that exist is a willingness to fix things in the moment but a willingness to disagree and realize that their perception is not the perception but simply a perception. [17:10]
It is an opportunity actually to revisit communication and help people work better together and an opportunity to revisit trust. [17:49]
We have to make sure that people understand how to collaborate effectively and have the tools and resources to do it. [18:03]
Remember that proving somebody wrong doesn't make you right. Instead of trying to prove someone wrong, so you can be right, use that energy to bridge understanding and collaboration. [23:33]
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Transformation on the Other Side of Pain - Dr. Fleet Muall

"The thing that's so radical about radical responsibility is that it's the idea of embracing every circumstance we face in life." Dr Fleet Muall
The worst turn of events can turn out to be the best thing to happen, which turns someone's life around to be more useful and meaningful. This is true for our guest today, Dr Fleet Muall, who was able to turn his bad luck of being imprisoned into a journey of growth and transformation. Dr. Fleet attributes this to taking ownership of his actions and working towards being and doing better.
Dr. Fleet Maull, PhD and author, is a renowned growth mindset teacher who delivers his training programs and seminars worldwide, both in-person and online, through Heart Mind Institute. He is a meditation teacher, executive coach, seminar leader and social entrepreneur who works at the intersection of personal and social transformation. Fleet founded the Prison Mindfulness Institute and National Prison Hospice Association, catalyzing two national movements while serving a 14-year mandatory-minimum federal drug sentence, 1985 to 1999.
Dr Maull developed the Radical Responsibility empowerment model that embraces 100 percent ownership for every circumstance we face, free of blaming oneself or others. Fleet is a Roshi (Zen master) in the international Zen Peacemaker Order and Acharya (senior Dharma teacher) in the global Shambhala meditation community. He is the author of Radical Responsibility: How to Move Beyond Blame, Fearlessly Live our Higher Purpose and Become an Unstoppable Force for Good in the World https://amzn.to/3sm7m3M.
In today's episode, Dr Fleet will discuss the eventful journey that led him to become one of the most renowned teacher and coach. He will also provide insights on practicing mindfulness and why it is important, especially in the current world.
Listen in!
Social media handles:
https://www.radicalresponsibilitybook.com/   
https://www.fleetmaull.com/ 
 https://www.heartmindinstitute.co/  
https://www.heartmindinstitute.co/nsm-foundation/  
https://www.bestyear.life/  
https://www.prisonmindfulness.org/  
https://www.mindfulpublicsafety.org/  
https://www.engagedmindfulness.org/  
https://www.npha.org/  
https://www.linkedin.com/in/fleetmaull/  
https://www.facebook.com/fleetmaull/  
https://Twitter.com/FleetMaull/  
I spent 14 years in a maximum security, federal prison on drug charges from 1985 to 1999 and not something I'm proud of at all, especially the activities that got me there. [3:04]
But I do feel really good about what I did with my time. While I was there, I was fortunate that I had a lot of skills and training and education before I went to prison, which kind of begs the question of why I ended up there. [3:16]
I earned my way into that federal prison time, but when I got there, it was a huge wake-up call, especially because my son was nine years old at the time, and I realized he was not going to grow up without a dad. [3:45]
When I went in, I had a master's degree and a very intense clinical trade three-year clinical training program, and I had been trained as a meditation teacher and a Buddhist teacher for ten years. [4:52]
I had a strong background, and I was devastated over what I had done to myself and my family, especially my son. [5:06]
I've lived this very disciplined life of a prison monk, getting up at four or five in the morning and practicing intensively. [5:33]
When I arrived there, I realized that it was an incredibly negative environment and that everyone had their own victim story of one kind or another. [6:24]
Naturally trying to survive, you tend to armor up with your own story and anger and bitterness. Unfortunately, that prevents us from accessing genuine regret and remorse for any harm we've created, which fuels the journey of transformation. [6:57]
It was really clear to me that I didn't want to end up coming out of prison broken, angry and bitter, and I didn't want to live that way when I was in there. [7:11]
I realized that the only way through and out for me was to embrace 200% responsibility for having got myself in there, what I was going to do with my time there, and what I would be able to create for myself if I was ever able to get beyond the prison journey. [7:22]
I stepped out of prison and into a career as a management consultant and executive coach, leading turnarounds and transformative change processes in business. [8:32]
My time in prison trained me how to work with people and how to be skillful under the most challenging situation. [10:45]
There is a term called a pain paradox in psychology, where our natural instinct is to withdraw from pain. [11:15]
But we all know through many disciplines, historically, across cultures into modern psychology, and everything that transformations on the other side of pain and that all the joy and transformation and possibilities on life are on the other side of it. [11:27]
The thing that's so radical about radical responsibility is that it's the idea of embracing every circumstance we face in life. [12:00]
We look at that not to blame ourselves at all, but simply for learning because once I see how it works and how I got from point A to B to C, I can make different choices in the future and get different results. [12:35]
But then there are also situations and circumstances that we may feel we had nothing to do with, and everyone would agree it just fell out of the sky and landed on our heads, and those things may be incredibly unjust. [12:45]
For ourselves, at some point, we question whether we are going to let it take us down, but here it is, and so I have to find some creative way to respond to it, transform it and move forward in my life. [13:02]
Most of us associate things like responsibility and accountability with blame; we've all been enculturated into this culture of shame and blame. [14:06]
It is simply about focusing my energy to do the most good, embracing my capacity for a creative response to life, and doing the best I can with that. [15:03]
While I was in prison, I just focused on my practice and modelled it in terms of who I was, and people became attracted to it. [15:55]
At some point early on, I also started corresponding with other prisoners. I realized it was a much bigger thing that I could do, so I started the prison Dharma network, primarily known as the prison mindful Institute. [16:12]
We have a program called the path of Freedom, a mindfulness-based emotional intelligence training program for prisoners in 21 states in seven countries. [16:37]
We have got involved in the whole criminal justice and public safety system that all grew out of being in a prison cell and saying, "What can I do to transform myself and to bring value to the world?" [17:18]
I also have my whole for-profit business, where I am putting out summits and offering lots of online courses and online challenges that are basically in the realm of integration of mindset and so forth. [17:39]
Growing up, nobody taught us anything about how to navigate the most complex system in the known universe: the human brain and nervous system. We didn't get much training on how to communicate with others. [18:42]
My mindfulness and emotional intelligence training, all these things, are just kind of the basic toolkit for life. [18:55]
Commercial break. [19:09]
We have something called the autonomic nervous system that operates almost the whole of the human body, the human brain and the nervous system, and it has two branches. [21:01]
The sympathetic branch upregulates and is about alertness, distress, and fighter flight, and the parasympathetic branch downregulates and is about relaxation, rest and recovery. [21:13]
The problem is in the modern life, most of us have way too much sympathetic activation, and that's called stress. [21:36]
Over time, that's the source of all the chronic stress-related illnesses, which diminishes the quality of life altogether. [22:06]
A simple skill that you can learn is called strong breathing because our autonomic nervous system are connected with the breath. [22:21]
When we breathe in, there's a slight sympathetic activation when we breathe out slight parasympathetic activation. [22:34]
Straw breathing can be a lifesaver, and it is so simple anyone can learn it. You breathe into the nose with your mouth close, and then you breathe out through pursed lips. [23:06]
One more thing that people can easily add to is 478 breathing, where you breathe in that fourth count, hold for seven counts, and then breathe out for the eighth count. [26:03]
This idea of radical responsibility is not new, it has been around for a long time. [30:27]
Marcus Aurelius said that most people feel their circumstances determine their destiny, but our response to those circumstances determines our destiny and even being able to respond to circumstances rather than being in just our condition reactivity. [30:32]
Most of us walk around thinking we're autonomous, but we're highly mechanical, and so we need to embrace some practices to become more wakeful and more present. [31:04]
Learning something like mindfulness and then embracing this idea of living our lives more in the driver's seat of our own life will transform any circumstance. [31:30]
Regardless of the situation, looking for what I can do put you right back in the mind of solution-based thinking, and there is always a million different things we could do. [31:40]
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